Once again, I've come up with a dumb song parody or two. I'm working on an "American Pie" version... I think I heard someone else did one, but I saw part of it (was it posted here? I just don't know) and the scansion was all weird... so do with this for a while.

The BT Bunch (sung to the "Brady Bunch" theme song, as if that wasn't obvious) Here's the story of a man named Hubbard Who had a bunch of mindless drooling slaves All of them had sailor hats, like their master And no one ever shaved.

And here's the story of a dwarf named Davey Who was shorter than a seven-year-old girl He was paranoid and fey, and looked quite fetching With hair in poodle curls.

So the one day when this dwarf bumped off his mentor We all knew -- it was much more than a hunch That this group would soon become a nut-cult And that's the way they all became the BT Bunch!

(chorus) The BT Bunch... The BT Bunch That's the waaaaay they becaaaame the BT Bunch!

The BT Bunch!

Thetan in the Sky (sung to "Spirit in the Sky", apologies to Norman Greenbaum) When I drop my body one of these days Gonna get reimplanted in space When I lay me down to die Goin up to the Thetan in the Sky <chorus 1>

Goin up to the Thetan in the Sky That's where I'm gonna go when I die When I die and I drop my MEST Gonna go to the place that's the best.

Never been out-ethics, I never sinned I got a friend in L. Ron So you know that when I die It's gonna recommend me to the Thetan in the Sky.

<chorus 2>

Oh, recommend me to the Thetan in the Sky That's where you're gonna go when you die When you die and you drop your MEST Gonna go to the place that's best.

Never been out-ethics, I never sinned I got a friend in L. Ron So in RPF when I die I hope I'll get set up with the Thetan in the Sky <bridge>

<chorus 3>

Oh, set me up with the Spirit in the Sky That's where I'm gonna go when I die When I die and I drop my MEST Gonna go to the place that's best, Go to the place that's best Go to the place that's best.

<guitar solo til fade>

-- Lianna Skywalker http://freespeech.org/liannaskywalker

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