I just got back from the Cult Information Services forum in Newark, N.J.

where I learned of Steve Allen's death and we held a moment of silent prayer. Sitting behind me was Reverend Carmichael of the Church of $cientology without his priest's collar, Mrs. Yingling--one of their attorneys, and Tim Lassears(???) a public relations officer. There came a point when one of the speakers, a woman who had been in the ICC, said that in her church they always pointed back to the original Greek version of the Bible, but that the church used the International Version. During the ensuing question and answer period I asked her whether one could go into any book store, buy their Bible and go home and read it for themselves to make the decision as to whether it was right for them, as I pointed out, the total word is right there for many traditional Christians, Jews and Muslims.

Or, I asked her, was their some secret agenda, something that you had to go to the church to learn as, I said while outstretching my left arm, you find in the Mormon Church on the one hand, or, turning behind me and pointing with my right outstretched arm to the Scientologists seated behind me, as you do in the Church of Scientology.

During the break Tim, their public relations guy, asked me their CANned question "what is a cult?" as if I was some hick from Kansas. And so I said, Tim your church has the reputation of being the most litigious church in the world and here you're asking me questions right in front of your lawyer.

I'm not going to answer that but I'll tell you this, I was in the Straight cult (a drug rehab program for adolescents that I had put my son in), and I told him, everyone here was in their particular cult, but whatever cult we were in, we all know about the Church of Scientology. And, I added, I am in another cult. I am a Mason. Oh, you talk about secrets, Tim remarked, implicating the Masons are a secret society. Yes we have secrets Tim and I can't tell you because I'd have to kill myself. But we're a men's club Tim, not a church. It's like the Wizard of Oz, I added. Huh his eyes implored?

You know, I answered his eyes, when the house fell on the Wicked Witch of the East and Dorothy turned to Glenda and said, "but you can't be a witch, you're beautiful." And Glenda set her straight telling her that not all witches were ugly and mean, rather some were beautiful and good. Tim and Ms. Ylingling looked at each other and at me as if to ask what in the hell is this guy talking about. You see what I'm saying, I concluded, there are good cults and there are bad cults. I'm in a good cult.

And finally to Ms. Yingling, I said, I know of you. And she asked how so. So I told her name was all over the internet. She said I never knew that and I said of course not because names like mine are on the exclusion list and you can't read correspondence from me. I mean, I told her, I might be blowing smoke out my butt or I might have some substance, but you Scientologists are apparently not allowed, as I understand it, the freedom to make that choice.

There was a woman speaker who told about a therapy cult she had been in. The guru, named George, would shake his head wildly from side to side to radiate some sort of physic energy. He convinced her to take her bio-feedback therapy sessions in his office with the both of them in the nude. The guru was having sex with the women in the cult including presumably her mother too. When his dog died he kept his rotting remains in the house. He kept the dogs soul in a rock. I asked her whether this man had ever discussed becoming a church, especially did he mention for the purpose of obtaining First Amendment protection. She said he had been ordained last month. I sensed that the Scientologists were there with their attorney to make sure you did not slander their good name, but also, among other reasons, to defend George's right to his church. "I may not agree with you, but I will defend to the death of me your right to say it." You know the Robspierre stuff that used to make sense. Well in light of Heaven's Gate and George I think we need for the Church of Scientology to defend the rights of just five more fringe religions before this country will be ready to take the stand of the French government to define: "just what the hell is a church?"

Which is the reason I was a lone picketer a few months ago in front of the French Embassy to support their stand on this issue.

PS Check out the Republican ties to the Straight cult of which I was a former member at www.fornits.com/straight Thank you, Wesley Fager
Oakton, Virginia

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