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The Regime Report #3

http://www.truthaboutscientology.com/regime/

The Regime Report : Word Play (Volume 1, Number 3)

By Murray Luther
Unofficial Correspondent for
the Church of Scientology

Word Play

About a year ago I watched a movie called "The Mummy's Curse" and it turned out to be a complete disappointment. It was your more-or-less typical old black and white horror flick, full of corny dialogue and half-baked special effects. But that's not why I was disappointed. I at least expected that. The movie had an even more fundamental flaw-- two flaws actually: 1) There was no mummy; 2) There was no curse. You might say I had a false expectation as to what I was going to see. Good title, lousy movie.

More recently, I received a mailer from the Church-backed Citizens Commission on Human Rights. The mailer offered, "You are invited to a CONFIDENTIAL closed-door Briefing and Dinner" Unlike the Mummy's Curse, I'd already seen this movie and knew the whole plot by heart. I didn't have to read too deeply between the lines to understand what CCHR was really saying: "Come to our dinner and give us the opportunity to brow-beat you into giving us thousands of dollars."

CCHR knows very well that "fund raiser" doesn't sound nearly as attractive as "exclusive get-together for an elite few." Frankly, the only thing you need to qualify for any CCHR event is a checkbook or credit card. Perhaps that's not so surprising, but what some may indeed find surprising is that Scientologists are well aware of these sorts of marketing gimmicks, and they tend to take it in stride.

It's no big secret that formulating the right combination of words is a commonplace practice in marketing and advertising. Catchy slogans and attractively named products are all part of promotion, and the Church of Scientology understands this as well as anyone. When promoting events, meetings, and various gatherings, it's not enough to just say "Come on down." You need to play the advertising game.

L. Ron Hubbard was keenly aware of the necessity of advertising. So much so, that he included a Department of Promotion and Marketing in his organization board which every Church organization is obligated to have.

In addition to that, Hubbard wrote a number of Policy Letters on the subject of marketing and promotion, well known to Church execs as the Marketing Series. With titles like "The Basics of Marketing,"

"Copywriting," and "Ads and Copywriting," Hubbard laid out an extensive scheme for Church organizations to implement their own promotion.

Within any Church or Church related org, elaborate promotional programs are always in play. For example, "The Year of the OT," and "The Golden Age of Tech," are but two among many examples of the Church's efforts to market their services. "Total Spiritual Freedom," is a classic phrase still used to this day. The meaning of such catch phrases is less important than the enthusiasm they're supposed to generate. Any time the Church promotes anything, a great deal of time and attention has been put into finding the most effective words to get their message across. Just as it's done in the professional world, marketing executives within the Church survey their public to discover what they will respond to most favorably.

When I received the CCHR mailer, I was immediately taken by their opening line inviting me to their "CONFIDENTIAL [caps included] closed-door Briefing" I'd gotten used to this kind of come-on, but at the same time I understood I was looking at the latest variation of a well known expression familiar to anyone who understands the Church's promotional style. The operative word here was "briefing," the ubiquitous and overused term that orgs everywhere have been using for years. You can walk through any org and eventually find some notice pasted on a wall somewhere, sometimes hastily put together with a magic marker, or a print-out from some exec's computer, announcing the latest news on the latest happenings of the latest program or campaign. At the top of the flyer you'll see in bold letters, "briefing," or some variation of that. Well, even the slow-learning Scientologist sooner or later figures out what this means:

"reging and recruiting in progress."

Scientologists never say it out loud, but they all recognize this red flag when they see it. They are fully aware that every single briefing ends with Church efforts to get attendees to pay for more services or materials, join a Church staff unit, or volunteer for some Church directed activity. Amusingly, Scientologists manage to be coy about this little game by playing along. It's an odd little group agreement tacitly maintained for the sake of their own PR. Yet the purpose is always the same: The expansion of Scientology. And that means more people buying services, more people doing services, and more people delivering services.

The math is simple.

Over the years, the Church has found it necessary to constantly repackage the two most important activities they have-- reging and recruiting.

Although the bottom line remains the same, the words change according to the latest marketing tabulations. Maybe the word "briefing" is just a simple and convenient way to avoid having to always use the "R" words. In any case, all briefings carry some management driven agenda, and there's hardly a Scientologist who doesn't know it. But you'll hardly ever hear the word registrar or recruiter ever associated with the all purpose event-- the ever present briefing.

I have on rare occasion made a point of this peculiar word game and have gotten varying results. I once got a call from a registrar inviting me to the latest Church briefing, and I asked, "So does this briefing involve reging or recruiting?" Well, the reg, who was a casual acquaintance, didn't miss a beat and replied, "Oh, there'll be plenty of both." Another time, I got a call from some "call-in unit" person, who practically ordered me to attend some "vital briefing." I posed the same question, and got an ill-humored reaction. "Is that supposed to be some wise-guy "1.1"* remark?" I suppose it was, but I insisted, "It's reging or recruiting, one or the other. Which one is it?" The caller refused to acknowledge the question, and instead responded, "I'll make a note here, [for who?] that you have no intention of attending." I guess that meant I was being put on someone's list of "difficult" Scientologists.

Well, it's time to get everyone in the loop here. For your edification and enlightenment, I present to you the translated hierarchy of briefing terms used throughout Scientology organizations. Note that I've enhanced the nomenclature slightly by incorporating the US Homeland Security color flash system into the mix. It seems to work, so I'm staying with it.

[code blue] Briefing: We need to get our stats up.

[code yellow] Important Briefing: Last week's briefing didn't bring us the numbers we'd hoped for

[code orange] Vital Briefing: Management is now demanding to see some stats, pronto.

[code red] Urgent Briefing: Management has us in the crosshairs, and heads are about to roll.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to attend the latest super-important confidential briefing where I've been promised the latest inside scoop from the Church's top officials. But somehow I get the feeling it's going to be The Mummy's Curse all over again. There'll be nothing particularly confidential discussed, and worse, it's not going to be brief.

* 1.1; from the Scientology Tone Scale, designating Covert Hostility.

Murray Luther is the pen name of a Scientologist of over twenty-five years who currently remains in good standing with the Church. He's the founder of the Scientology Independent Network, (http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Scn_Ind_Network/) an advocacy group for former members of the Church of Scientology.

All views expressed here are those of Murray Luther and do not necessarily reflect the views of truthaboutscientology.com or scientology-lies.com.

All material by Murray Luther is copyrighted, with all rights reserved by the author. Material posted by Murray Luther on the internet may be reproduced for non-commercial use only.

-- Kristi Wachter the activist formerly known as "Jour" (before $cientology outed me)

If I am not who you say I am, then you are not who you think you are.

- James Baldwin

I think $cientology is hurting people and breaking the law, and I want them to stop it. See http://www.scientology-lies.com for more.

KSW: http://www.truthaboutscientology.com/alteringtech.htm

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