I know this isn't alt.support.lord-xenu, but I'm in the mood to do some "sharing". Some of it's on-topic, some may not be. Deal.

I had the day off today to run some errands in the city of my alma mater. One of them was a deep-cover assignment for the ARSCC (wdne).

That was to be the last of the day, but it set the tone for the whole day.

I got on the road bright and early, and was entering the city at the height of the rush-hour. On a busy, 6-lane divided highway, I saw a young woman get out of her car (pulled over on the shoulder) and start walking - clearly a car problem. I didn't even think about it - I just pulled over, backed up to her and asked her if she needed a ride. I must have looked "normal" enough for her to feel safe, so she accepted and I drove her about 2 miles to the nearest phone (that's 2 miles, for you metric folks ;-) ).

Later in the day, I was walking the busy campus and noticed what seemed to be a folded-up check on the sidewalk. I paused to pick it up and saw that it was a paycheck written from a local restaurant to a womans name, for about $60. I thought back to my student days and remembered how traumatic it would have been to lose $60 back then (well, given my current life, it would be pretty traumatic now too).

So I walked over to the restaurant, about 5 blocks out of my way and found a couple of the other "kids" working there and gave it to them. They recognized her name immediately and said, "she was just here a half-hour ago to pick it up - she's going to be so happy!" I made them promise to call her as soon as possible so she wouldn't worry. They wanted my name so she could call and thank me, but I refused - it would be a long distance call, and I didn't do it expecting anything in return.

BTW, it was endorsed - I could have cashed it. What would a hungry rice_n_beans SO'er have done?

That's why I mention these two incidents. From what I understand about Scientology, both of my actions would be considered unethical - "out-ethics" because I performed a service for others without receiving anything in return.

IMHO, a "religion" that teaches people it's wrong to be kind just for the sake of being kind is itself unethical. Any Scientologists want to explain to me if and how I'm mistaken about this point?

Well, I was really in town for two appointments. First I saw an ENT (ears, nose and throat) specialist. Yes, I would need to take DRUGS to improve my "case" (life). Could Scientology cure a chronic sinus condition? Are anti-biotics EEeevil? Scientologist Travis Sargent seems to think so, having described "Z-pack"

(a commonly-prescribed antibiotic course) as a "psych drug".

Should I have had auditing instead of taking drugs?

Wait - that was a trick question, because my next appointment was with my (... wait for it ... ) _PSYCHOLOGIST_!!

That makes me, as I understand it, an "illegal pre-clear", someone ineligible ever to receive Scientology services. Not only that, but as I've written in the past, I have been "declared" as a Suppressive Person for picketing at the "Dianetics" center in Minneapolis.

As I understand it, being an illegal and an SP means that I, in LRH's words, should be "disposed of quietly and without sorrow," perhaps with "process R2-45" - shot dead with a Colt 45 pistol.

I've never before "outed myself" about this psych issue.

In the past I've said that I came to ars over the censorship issue and the attempted rmgroup, but I stayed and picketed because these people would kill me if they ever acquired the power to do so.

Again, Scientologists, _please_ correct me if I'm wrong.

My session with the evil psych was really a breakthrough. We've been "working" for about 4 months now. I've finally scraped away enough mental scar tissue that today, I was able to lance a psychic abscess that has been festering for at least 5 years.

For years it's felt like there's been a black cloud over my life.

Over the last few months, the weather has been clearing and today the sun broke out. And the non-emotional weather too was bright and clear - classic early fall - late summer in Wisconsin.

The best time of the year in Wisconsin IMO. The people, trees, sky, everything was beautiful. I felt connected to everything. I felt better than I have for so long I can hardly remember. Wow.

But Scientology, by policy, would refuse to even try to help me get where I am today. Not only that but they would actively seek to harm me, if not for being an illegal, certainly for speaking out against them - being an SP.

Will the "Church" and OSA seek to "find out the who" and identify me? Spread rumors that I am a child molester, criminal and copyright terrorist?

I'm guessing that I'm still too small a fish to get that treatment. But if I'm wrong I will take my lumps (yeah, I'm far from perfect and have dirty laundry I'd rather not have publicized - none of the classic DA shit, though), but I will take it as a badge of honor. If I have to be persecuted for a good cause, so be it. At the very least I would see any money they spend on PI's for me as a worthy diversion from other critics and from other, more nefarious activities this "Church" has been proven to be involved in.

And my ARSCC (wdne) mission? Well, it didn't pan out today, but I've got my troller motor running and my rig is set - maybe soon I'll get a bite.

One last note. On my drive home, the sun was setting, quite beautifully, behind me. I love that back-lit shallow-angle light on a still-green landscape. Up ahead a mile or so I saw birds circling. "What are those - hawks? gulls?" I got nearer and realized it was a squadron of radio-controlled planes! Everywhere from 2 to 5 foot wing-spans (for you metric types that's... uh, nevermind). I've loved them since I was a kid - always wished I had one but never got around to it. Too many other hobbies.

I invited myself into a farmers field and sheepishly said I hoped I wasn't trespassing, but I really wanted to watch the planes. I was welcomed with open arms and told to "come on in and enjoy the show!" I got to see the champion dog fighter (didn't ask champion of what - the state, the club...?) flying his "Zero" model. I've read about dogfighting with RC planes before - they tie a ribbon to the tail of the planes and whomever cuts the most ribbon from his opponent wins.

This guy was amazing! At least as good as any air show ("real" planes) I've seen on TV. You'd have to be there to really appreciate it. Loops and rolls and Immelmans and tight circles....

Another guy was flying a model of an aerobatics planes and doing some of the stunts I've seen on TV - flying straight up until it completely stalled, then going into a series of impossible tumbles, then miraculously pulling out into controlled flight.

A great end to a great day out.

To you staff or SO Scientologists reading this - when was the last time you had a day this nice?

From what I've read, it sounds like you have to live with a lot of pressing deadlines, little sleep, poor diet and screaming "superiors". I really feel for you and hope you can see some of what you're missing in the world outside.

And again, if I'm mistaken about my impression of Scientology, I would welcome getting "in comm". I will not be giving out my email address - I'm not going to make it any easier for OSA to harass and fair-game me than I have to, but I will be monitoring this "line" - most especially this thread. I read all the headers of ars, but perhaps only 10% of the message bodies. Title a thread to get my attention and I'll be there. If you don't like using the silly nom I'm posting this under, call me, Peter Wang Sincerly arc'ing Formerly attested to SP2, now further attesting to a micro- clam cluster for my fishing expedition.

PPS That's another pseudonym. Don't go bothering any Wang's you find in the phone book. I just picked it out of thin air.

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