Last Saturday was the date of the Gay Pride Parade in San Diego.

Richard, aka "Dick" to Ken Hoden and I decided to take the opportunity to pass out some fliers to the gay community. Rather than work the parade crowd, as Zinj and I had done with Mark Bunker (where's our video, Mark??) we took lawn chairs and set up near the terminus of the parade, where a festival had been erected for the occasion. This was held in beautiful Balboa Park, one of the gems in San Diego. My sign read, "WARNING! $CIENTOLOGY PREYS ON THE GAY COMMUNITY!"

I brought Purple Inflatable Xenu, having drowned him in the bathtub to determine where his air leak was located. He kept going limp, and it would not do to arrive on Pride Day with a flaccid Galactic Overlord!

Newly patched, and with a fetching hair fluffy clipped to him, Lord Xenu was ready for the affair! I also brought along my org of Fortune Clams which I'd mocked up for the occasion. These are glued together clam shells with little rolly eyes glued to them. Each one contained a 'fortune' that said, "You will save a friend or loved one from $cientology, www.xenu.net" The victims of several clambakes, their little thetans can rest assured that their earthly remains are being put to good use. Also on the list, a stack of fliers aimed specifically at the gay community, these contain some choice Hubbard quotes revealing his opinions on homosexuality.

Due to that damn MEST universe, we arrived while the parade was still going on, I had thought it began at 10 am and it actually started at noon. Our butts firmly emplanted in our lawn chairs, we started enticing passersby. Many, many people responded to my "Hey! Scientology Sucks!"

come on with a laughing, "I know!" Richard had success with his pleading, "Please, take one of my fliers!!!" The prize for Most Memorable Contact goes to the older gent on a bicycle who sidled up and said, "Do you know why you're gay?" After processing my response, he changed it to "Do you know why THEY'RE gay?"

He then proceeded to give me a muddled cosmology which involved living in the third dimension, God's punishment after death, reincarnation, and benevolent space aliens. Did you know that we all have at least a couple of space aliens accompanying us at all times to protect us? He has seen his! He said, "You have them too," at which point I confirmed it by hauling Gay Xenu to the fore. To my relief, he finally took himself off, his was a strange and unpopular message considering the makeup of the crowd.

Several people declared their Christian affiliation, seeming to think that would protect them from Scientology's enticements. I explained the deal to them, that Scientology assures you you can be both Christian, Jew, Moslem, gay and a Scientologist. These people took fliers and, although they felt fairly safe, promised to inform their friends. Many people thanked us for being there. We got a lot of thumbs up (no honks, they were walking in the park!) from people who had already learned about the scam. As the line to get into the festival grew, I considered working the crowd there but came all over shy. I should have. I didn't want to do it alone, and somebody had to watch our stuff. We could have given out many more fliers by doing that. What a time to retreat into my shell, so to speak! I get that way sometimes.

Notably and happily absent were our grim-faced, unsmiling photographers from the "Church" of Scientology! Absent too, was the eerily grinning "Smiley Guy" from Gold Base and the Comic Convention. You don't think they took my "Let's Picket Gold Base" post last week seriously, do you?

Could it be that they were waiting for me in Hemet, along with the Riverside Sheriff's Dept, panting in antici-PATION for my arrival? Gee, I sure hope not! It would have cost the cult some much needed dinero to have that all set up! And you know how much they love money! I'd sure hate to get some poor OSA goon in trouble with DM for falling for such a transparent ruse! No, really! <snicker>

We handed out fliers for about two hours. While I was being subjected to the bicycle man's bizarre theories, Richard wandered off with some fliers. When he came back, he told me about the man he saw in line, reading our flier out loud to his neighbors.

Although we only gave out less than 100 fliers, this event has great potential for a massive information fest. Zinj and I gave out several hundred two years ago. Had more people joined us Saturday, the group dynamic probably would have been different, and my reticent evil thetan would not have taken over my body. Oh well, there's always next year. I urge everyone in cities where Pride Day is celebrated to consider this event. And I would hope that some of you Angelinos would come down for it next time!

We had a pretty gay time of it all!

This is true, -- Barb Chaplain, ARSCC http://members.home.net/bwarr1/index.htm http://www.geocities.com/bwarr_2000/ mirror site "Every week, every month, every year, every decade and now every century, Scientology does weird and stupid things to damage its own reputation." -Steve Zadarnowski "Comparing Scientology to a motorcycle gang is a gross, unpardonable insult to bikers everywhere. Even at our worst, we are never as bad as Scientology." - ex-member, Thunderclouds motorcycle "club"

Go Back