I have added a new page to www.scientology-lies.com entitled "Terry F Responds."
It's at http://www.scientology-lies.com/terryf2.html :
Terry F. Responds Terry was a member of Scientology from the late 70s until 1981. Her involvement ended after Scientologists subjected her to days on end of silent treatment and isolation.
In 1998, a friend of hers discovered stories about her on the web, mentioning her by name, describing her incarceration and mistreatment by other Scientologists. She was stunned and amazed to see her name made public in this way.
One way she coped with the discovery that this intensely painful episode had been made public was to tell her own story anonymously.
Now, she has responded more directly to some of the stories she found on the net. What follows is her response to one of them. (The lines beginning with > are from the original article; the other lines are from Terry.)
*Subject: Re Miss X files
*From: Terry_F@bigfoot.com
in response to
> Subject: Miss X Files #11 PSYCHOTIC BREAKS AND ISOLATION
A friend of mine originally found this article (partly about me)
on a website. Until I found and studied various Hubbard Communications
Office Bulletins (therapy tech) and Hubbard Communications Office
Policy Letter (company policy) on the internet, I did not believe that
incarcerating individuals, cutting them off from all communication and
drugging them was scientology. I believed that what happened to me was
a fluke. I was wrong. Not only are such things done, in accordance
with Hubbard's writings, such things (based only on published accounts)
have been happening on the average of once a year, for over 20 years.
A number of times, since Lisa McPherson's death.
I had intended to leave this alone - but as long as my name, my child's and ex-spouse's name is on the internet, I don't feel that _I_ am being left alone - as is my right as a private person. So - this is the end of writing about me or my family (scientology or critics) without permission. OK?
I am not interested in being or having any enemy.
I don't hate scientology or scientologists. I do hate abuse.
Scientologists, this practice is wrong, harmful and crippling. You need to get honest, investigate, STOP this practice, and make amends.
You may consider this to be a report.
> Newsgroups: alt.religion.scientology
> From: nobody@huge.cajones.com (Huge Cajones Remailer) ["Miss X" wrote:]
>
> While on staff in the Sea Org, I had personal knowledge of two Sea
> Org
> staff and one "public person" who suffered psychotic breaks
Note: the scientology definition of "psychotic" includes not following
orders... amongst other things. Quite different from medical
definition.
> and were locked
> up in "ISO" (isolation). I will talk about the Sea Org staff in this
> post.
> The "public person" is discussed in another post.
>
> The first was Peter L., who was an "OT" and was Sea Org staff at
> Bridge
> Publications.
Peter ran an incredible "Dianetics" TV campaign for "Publications
Organization, US", which included commercials with such notables
as actress Joani Prather and football star John Brody... I don't
believe that "Bridge Publications" (as such) existed at this time.
> His wife, Vicky L. was also Sea Org staff, and was the
> Commanding Officer of the LA Org.
Vicky (from at least late '75 or early '76), was the Commanding
Officer of the Publications org... until she left, and remarried
(around '79-'80, I'm not sure.)
> Peter was put in isolation (referred to
> as "ISO") and was guarded around the clock by other Sea Org staff who
> were OTs.
After his completion of the television campaign, Peter gave a
speech to the staff. I didn't see him for awhile, after - I
heard a rumor (referring to his speech) that he had been a "psych
case". I had difficulty believing this, as I had highest respect
for Peter, a very strong and capable individual.
> One such person who was assigned to watch Peter and to make sure
> that
> he "destimulated" to the point that he was no longer "Type 3" was a
> fellow
> Sea Org staff member by the name of Bill Duckhorn. A big, strong, burly
> fellow, Bill was also on staff at Bridge Publications.
Hm. At this point, it still would have been Pubs US, not "Bridge".
Also, this description of Bill implies something other than the gentle giant that Bill was.
> The whole affair was very hushed up. There was no announcement made
> to staff about Peter's having gone "Type 3".
This seems correct. There was a rumor that he was a "psych case"
and was staying at the complex (not his home) for awhile.
> I found out about it from "the
> rumor line", which is the way staff in the Sea Org find out about lots
> of
> things management doesn't want us to know of or talk about. There is
> even a
> Hubbard policy which states, "If it isn't written, it isn't true."
>
> There are MANY Sea Org staff at Bridge Publications that knew about
> Peter's terrible ordeal.
Peter showed back up at Pubs (not yet "Bridge"), stating that
he was fine. I heard that he had also gone to Vegas, to find
out what he could about his (deceased) friend Quentin Hubbard.
> The list of persons who knew about it includes
> Treasury Secretary, Ben Elkington;
Ben may have held this job at that time - he tended to bounce
on & off of staff (dunno how he did it :). At one point Ben
was in the Sales division - hard to forget that - sometimes
he would play "Take This Job and Shove It", while we all sang
along at the top of our lungs!
> Manufacturing Secretary, John Mustard;
That he was - from at least late '75 or early '76, until I was
fired in 1981.
> Director of Income, Rosan Rich;
I never knew Rosan to be the Director of Income - she was with
the e-meter department, then was sent to scientology's "Flag"
organization for executive training, returned to become Vicky's Deputy Commanding Officer, later became the Officer in charge of divisions 1, 2 & 3 (Pubs US), then was promoted into the Guardian's Office, as "Bridge Publications" Deputy Guardian for Finance. (Maybe she was demoted after I was fired?) Sigh. Rosan disliked me intensely, and so I lost my favorite job as Vicky's assistant after Rosan's return from "Flag"...
The only Pubs/Bridge Directors of Income that I knew (from dates I already mentioned 'til 1981) were Donelda W, a tall slim fellow with glasses by the name of Marc, and then me, until I was fired without notice by Bridge Publications in 1981.
> Sales Manager, Michael Long;
For awhile, Mike was just a Sales Manager - for awhile, he later
ran the whole Sales & Delivery Division. I believe he was also,
temporarily, the Commanding Officer - before a fellow from Seattle
was brought in to hold that position.
> Sales Manager, Mike Golden;
Mike G. did start out as a Sales Manager (East US) - later he did
some tours with the recruiter and was also in the Publicity Division
(6) for a time.
> Mimeo I/C, John Toten;
Ah. Mr. Toten was a true fixture and nursed his mimeo files like a
baby, until his death at a ripe old age. (1980 or 81'ish)
> Sales Manager, Rick Findley;
West US sales, yes, amongst numerous other projects. Rick also
took his turn running the Sales & Delivery Division, did at
least one mission to "Flag" and, I'm told, was asked to be the
Commanding Officer of a new (promotional) organization.
He was also known for making jewelry, and for a little company called "GFR" that he & a friend put together.
> Flag Representative, Virginia (last name escapes me at the moment);
Her last name escapes me, too. Very pretty girl.
> The Auditor Magazine Editor, Diane Coletto;
A brilliant lady. She wound up in Publicity (Div 6) with Peter,
before she was killed. Diane designed an impressive cover for
one of the scientology books - unfortunately, a painting (ostensibly
by one of the Hubbard boys) was used instead.
> The Assistant Auditor Magazine Editor, Sue Baldwin;
The magazine, along with Sue, had been transferred back to the
"American Saint Hill" organization....
> the Assistant Guardian, Steve Huff;
Right name, right title - he held the finance position "from above"
for quite some time... his wife was also a Sales Manager, for years.
> and the Assistant Guardian Finance, Jae Duckhorn - just to name a few.
"Jae" was her nick-name. She was a letter writer when I first met her,
then she was in charge of "special projects", iirc. I don't know if
she really had a chance to be the Assistant Guardian Finance, as it
seems she was sent off to England right after that job assignment.
> If you are reading this, please let me know, Peter. I hope you are
> doing
> better now. I would like to hear your story about what happened from
> your
> point of view.
An old friend of mine, from back then, told me last year that he had
searched for & found Peter. When he tried to speak with Peter, a big
guy (a stranger) slammed Peter into a wall and told my friend to go
the hell away. (As I mentioned above, Peter showed back up, after,
and said he was ok. I don't know if I'd have stayed, if he hadn't.)
> The other person was Sea Org staff at Bridge Publications as well.
Any and all previous scientology contracts (including the symbolic/
volunteer/not legally binding sea org contracts) were replaced and
superceded by legally binding 5 year contracts when Publications US
became "Bridge Publications, Inc". Of course, most, if not all of
us idealistic staff, would wish to honor a symbolic contract to make
the planet a much better place for all...
> Her
> name was Terry F. Her psychotic break was not due to exposure to the "OT
> Levels". It was rumored that she had "gone Type 3 PTS" when her
[Name & gender of child deleted - not a good thing, naming innocent kids]
> was taken away from her custody.
Interesting ~rumors~, yes. I had been protesting and querying (not
following)
orders... (= psychotic?) two major orders, and one minor order, prior
to my unexplained incarceration. In addition to being physically ill
(=PTS).
I never lost custody.
Are any people who really knew me (and who may have some good things to say :) reading this? Chances are that I won't be reading ARS, but you can post & mail - I'll check for mail once a week or so.
> Terry was a friend of mine, and we
> sometimes used to hang out together with our children during "family
> time".
Boy, I wondered who Miss X might be... Rosan Rich? Nope. Not a
friend. Janie L.? Well, she did have two brothers (John L. was
my boss, the Treasury Secretary, when I ran the Income dept...)
but I don't remember that she had kids... besides, she was my friend only for the time she had a crush on a guy I worked with. [g] Both of these women were with the Guardian's Office (now called the "Office of Special Affairs", I understand).
Anyway, a male critic later told me that he was the source of this "Miss X" story. (At least, the part about me.)
I recall glimpsing a guy who might have been him (a little plump, a little florid, wire framed glasses) when I was being held in a room at the complex... we were both in the hallway - I was afraid that he'd gotten a terribly wrong impression, but before I had a chance to explain, he was gone.
I'd tried setting the mattress on fire in hopes that I would not have to go back into that horrid closet-like room.
Another fellow in a room across the hall passed me some cigarettes through the door knob hole, while the mess was cleared up.
> In the Sea Org, parents only got one hour per day at most to spend
> with
> their child(ren).
Eesh. This was one of the things I never went along with. My
baby stayed with me at work for several months, until a decent
child care center was set up. By then, Pubs org had moved from
Temple Street in LA, to the ("Big Blue") complex... and child
care was across the street, so I could continue to breast-feed.
> This one hour included the time it took to get to and
> from the "Complex" (at Berendo Street and Fountain Avenue) and the Cadet
> Org, which was next to Celebrity Center (at Bronson Street and Franklin
> Avenue). This took about 10-15 minutes each way, which meant we only had
> about 30 minutes per day to spend with our children. Many staff were
> pressured, if not outright ORDERED, to remain on post during family time
> to
> get their "stats" up (produce more than the week before).
Ah. This was a later child care location.
Apart from some times that our staff worked all night long, my child came home with me every night, in addition to [full] hour "family time" (until going on vacation with my ex).
> But to get back to the main story...
>
> As with all persons who "went Type 3", there was no announcement made
> to
> staff to explain Terry's sudden disappearance from her post at Bridge.
Actually, I was fired by Bridge (wouldn't be surprised if there
was no announcement, tho' the execs would have known) & I wound up
running errands for the liason office for a number of days... my
last errand was to the "New World Corps" (where new courses, such
as the "Key to Life" courses) were being developed and/or delivered
to staff, prior to release to scientology public.
I was supposed to hand-deliver a letter to a specific individual..
but somebody else snagged it. So I was hanging around to ensure that the letter was delivered to the correct individual... even though somebody else rudely told me to leave, before I could comply with my delivery order.
I had a conversation with a fellow who said he was the Director of Income of the LA org... during the course of which I told him that we should ~all~ treat each other with the high level of respect that we would give to LRH himself. Poor guy, wound up in the middle of the cross-orders I was getting... Boy, those people at the New World Corp were stunningly rude!
Anyway, I finally got fed up & got a ride home, where I intended to dig in & care for my poor sick (bad flu, whatever) self.
Then, for the most part of what I understand was a couple of months, nobody spoke to me.
> I
> just happened to find out about her having been put in "ISO" one day
> when I
> went up to the top floor of the Main Building at the Cedars Complex...
>
> She was locked alone in a small room with only a bed, and a guard was
> posted outside 24 hours a day.
I think this writer was lied to about the 24 hr/day "guard".
For the most part, I was left alone to rot.
[Portion deleted here - stuff that makes horror scenes from the "Exorcist" look like lovely sunny meadows] Good grief - people will and do believe whatever they choose to, but I don't think that Freedom of Speech means that it's OK for anonymous people using phony names to publish defamatory things (believed or not) about real (private & noncriminal) people - really ?!? Am I alone in feeling this way?
Oddly, no mention of ill health (starvation & bruises) is made in this article.
> Eventually Terry "destimulated" enough (at least this is what I was
> told), and she was sent back to her parents.
[shudders] And I also got to experience the delirium due to extreme
dehydration... It was a very long drive. (My apology to a fellow
whom I fought... I don't believe I was able to properly communicate
the fact that I could not swallow, and ~had~ to have water... And
to Mary - I'd borrowed her blouse, which got quite torn in the scuffle.)
> I never heard from her again.
Of course not, if you didn't write. My address was on file.
In fact, it was just this year that I stopped getting scientology mailings c/o a relative's old address.
> I often wonder how she is doing. And I would like to hear her tell the
> story about what happened.
Here you go. A little of the story, at least. You were lied
to about some things, and understandably got wrong ideas about
others.
> Are you reading this Terry ? I hope you are doing OK. I think of you
> often and pray that you are at peace.
Well, I suspended belief in various scientological things, along
with my unbelievable experience and started over.
Losing a life is kinda like losing a leg - ya don't recover it, ya just learn to live without it.
The "big blue" complex was never my home. And I remained without a home for the rest of that year.
> Love, Miss X - Another Old Timer (and Big Brother's BIG Sister)
Hmm... really not Rosan? Janie? Renata? (or, as my ex suggested,
Christie?)
Terry F.
To anyone with the original "Miss X" story on their site - please replace it with this. Apart from adding info, the only changes I've made to this article is deletion of unfriendly nastiness and a child's name and gender. Many many thanks for your kindness, -T- -- Kristi Wachter the activist formerly known as "Jour" (before $cientology outed me) I think $cientology is hurting people and breaking the law, and I want them to stop it. See http://www.scientology-lies.com for more.
Can you say "Xenu?" ... I knew that you could.