Yes...I'm outing myself. I was a Tom Cruise Body Thetan and I just got the boot as Tom just audited me out in a NOTS auditing session. I hung on for as long as I could and if I do say so myself, I did a neat job of avoiding being spotted for a long time.

Many of you may be envious of the dream gig I had as a Body Thetan this lifetime. But it wasn't always this way since the evil Xenu dumped us here millions of years ago and zapped us to attach ouselves to humans. The thing is that we are people too, we just don't happen to have physical bodies. We have to do the next best thing and attach ourselves to a human.

I don't know how I happened to end up attched to Tom Cruise as who would have thought that this nerdy twerp would end up a major movie star. But as fate would have it I ended up with a choice Body Thetan's position. Many of you probably know that Body Thetans were discovered by the awesome Humanitarian, L.

Ron Hubbard. He outed us with his "Wall of Fire' discovery and as you all know, Ron was the first human to make it through the 'Wall of Fire' and lived to tell about it.

Ron discovered that every human has clusters of invisible aliens spirits attached to them and they are causing all human physical and mental problems.

He called us Body Thetans or BTs for short. Yes, we could be considered alien spirits as we are the spirits of ET beings who were brought here to earth 75 million years ago. but we are also just people like everyone else.

Later Dr. Hubbard and David Mayo discovered that underneath the clusters of sleeping and drugged BTs are the BTs who make up the physical universe. Every body part of yours is a Body Thetan. Now guess which body part was my gig.

Give up? I was Tom Cruise's penis Body Thetan. I wasn't alone...there were other BTs there and countless numbers trying to get on. But I had the lead position...right on the end of his dick. Top that, if you can.

Yes, I had all of the great sex with gorgeous babes that any male Body Thetan could ever want. I won't drop names but all of you, of course, know about Nicole. At the outset Nicole was great but she resented Tom forcing her into Scientology and slowly the sex factor dropped away. There were some unpleasant encounters for sure and here I should explain that the accusations that Tom is gay are simply not true. There were some gay BTs that got in there and at times would seize control of his dick.

I must confess to having some fun. Sometimes at critical moments I would just float away and Tom's dick would go as limp as Heber Jentzsch's mental state.

Can you imagine that howls of laughter that resonated throught the BT ranks.

Tom became obsessed with his E-meter and began spending hours every day spotting BTs and auditing them away. I and the other BTs knew that our days were numbered and it became a wild game as to who would be spotted and audited away next. I lasted simply because Tom lost interest in my area. It never dawned on him that there might be Body Thetans on his private parts. I and the other BTs that were left were hoping against hope that Tom would lose his interest in Scientology and if that happend in time we would be spared the fate that we so dreaded.

Well, Tom had to do a Whole Track Sec. Check and some other actions and it was realized that Tom had never scanned his private parts with the E-meter. I was spotted and now "you know the rest of of the story." Tom Cruise will be totally free of Body Thetans soon and it would be interesting to see how he is going to keep 'it' up with me gone.

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