Everyday Creation 'Science'

From: Kurt Foster

Although the principles of "Creation 'Science'" are chiefly used to argue that the Earth is only about 6,000 years old, they have a number of applications to everyday life.

This is illustrated by depictions of their use in a few common situations, with which some readers may be familiar.

SITUATION 1 - Late for work:
BOSS: You're 15 minutes late! That'll cost you an hours' pay, and if it happens again, I'll have to let you go.

EMPLOYEE: I'll have you know that this day only BEGAN when I walked in the door, so I couldn't have arrived any sooner. And this is based on my religion, so if you don't give my position equal time, I'll haul you into court for religious persecution!

SITUATION 2 - Invites friend over to watch baseball game, but gets the game time wrong.
(Friend arrives, host turns on TV)

ANNOUNCER: ... That brings the count to 3 and 2. There's 2 out here in the bottom of the seventh, men on second and third, and a base hit will add a couple to that 7-4 lead...

FRIEND: Hey, what gives? This game's almost over!

HOST: Nonsense, it's just starting -- that game BEGAN this way!

SITUATION 3 - Part of book order not shipped:
CUSTOMER: Where the hell's Volume I? I paid good money for this book, and if you don't send me the whole thing, I'll sue!

SALES REP: We DID send you the whole thing! The book actually STARTS with Chapter 20! The first part of the Table of Contents is a deception slipped in by the printers...