apollonia asked this question on 5/7/2000:

I have been depressed for about two years, I am 18 years old, in college. Even though it was hard for me, I finally had the guts to go to counselling this year. I was quickly diagnosed by a doctor (as if I needed it confirmed) to have severe depression. He prescribed a heavy dose of effexor and suggested I keep on with the counselling. But I hated counselling, so I quit, and I refuse to take medication, for a lot of reasons.... and I know rejecting help is my fault, but I still wish I had somewhere else to go... I want desperately to feel good and go on with life, but I jsut can't make myself because on some level I really don't want to get better... I don't feel I deserve it. So now I am backing myself into this aweful place with nowhere to go... any thoughts? (besides suicide...)

Redeagle gave this response on 5/12/2000:

I am new here but I was browsing around ...and like so many of the others I hear desperation...I hope that you will continue to fight this feeling of hhopelessness that is attacking you...and I do mean attack! it is every bit as debilitating as a heart attack! or stroke... depression is an ugly bed fellow...but it need not be...you are intelligent or you would not be in college...you may have jumped into that a bit too soon, but that is not the problem....something else had to have happened to get you to this point and we both know it....I am psychic enough to hazard a guess but I won't...I am hoping that you will read this and send me a question in private so we can discus what is really happening...if you don't I won't try to contact you...it is up to you...I am going to tell you a lil secret I felt your pain and desperation before I saw the question...3 nights ago in fact....i looked for you but had no way to find you...I felt almost a fear in you then as I do now...please read this and ask for help....

peace be with you Pati

The average rating for this answer is 4.

apollonia rated this answer a 4.