I was in the local oriental market this evening. And I saw something there that was True Tacky through and through.

Religious pictures decorated with red, green and yellow flashing LEDs. They had three flavors: Jesus, Mary and Buddha (no shit!). Each character (including Buddha) had a halo which consisted of a rotating illuminated disk behind their heads in order to produce the very unconvincing effect that the character has rays shooting out of their head.

The LEDs were in different patterns, Jesus was tearing his chest open to display a flashing red Valentine shaped heart topped with a flashing (but not at the same rate as the red LEDS) yellow cross. Other LEDs of various colors were distributed about the picture in a seamingly random pattern.

Mary's heart was counting in binary. Buddha didn't have a pattern, his LEDs were randonly distributed.

Each of these monstrocities looked like they weighed about ten to fifteen pounds (I'd hate to be sitting under one when it fell off the wall) and was selling for the outrageous sum of 65.00.