rvh807735 asked this question on 7/4/2000:
Hi Loveable, I've got a little problem. I have been divorced for about 8 years. Haven't had a date in 3 years...can you believe that? I live in a small town in Texas so there ain't much to choose from. Well I met someone I want to go out with and have a date friday night. I'm ok on a second date but not a first. I have talked to her on the phone several times and even had a date set up last weekend but had an emergency and had to cancel. She is very busy and so am I and it was hard to schedule a time. I already feel insecure about this, like I won't be much fun, etc, etc, etc. She has never seen me, I have seen her at the place she is employed. I wrote a little biography and had a friend take it to her so she knows stuff about me. Well, How do I make this first date a success? I know I am too anxious and don't want to come off needy. I HATE FIRST DATES! Thanks for your help! Rick
loveable gave this response on 7/4/2000:
Hey Rick, It's not easy from what I hear.. to go on first dates after being divorced. However you just need to be yourself and be creative on your date. Don't worry about it not being a success, let me give you a tip of advice. When you go on your date, do not go to a movie. You want to converse on this date, keep talking with her and get to know her. Go minature golfing, or for a walk on one of the Texan beaches. Go to dinner, do something that will involve you to in finding out information about each other. Relax, and don't force yourself on her. She might already like from what you've told her in words. So make the date as casual as you can, yet fun, creative, and full of laughter. Remember one thing, when you start getting nervous, just take one breath and say I'm going to have fun on this no matter where it goes. Romance doesn't start in one night, it takes sometimes a few dates or more to really be able to trust the person with those feelings. Remember that. So Rick this is my advice to you, and let me know how it goes!
Loveable :)
rvh807735 asked this follow-up question on 7/5/2000:
Hi again Lovable, What do you think about taking flowers to her on this first date, maybe yellow roses (friendship)? I feel kinda negative about doing it so its probably a good thing, huh? Thanks, Rick
loveable gave this response on 7/5/2000:
Hey Rick, If you want to take her flowers with yellow roses, make it a combination with several different types of flowers such as orchids, tulips ect. A small yet friendly, summer bouquet to say thank you for this date tonight. One yellow rose, with other to compliment would be my simple advice, never feel negative about flowers, especially when you want to make a good first good impression! Have fun, and let me know!
Wishing for your dreams to come true, Loveable
rvh807735 asked this follow-up question on 7/8/2000:
Hi Lovable, Well, update on the date. It wasn't so much fun. As I told you I had seen her but she had not seen me. Well, I don't think she liked what she saw. We went to dinner and she said she needed to go back home and spend time with her 10 year old son. It was really ok with me because I was carrying the conversation and running out of things to talk about. She really doesn't know what she is missing. I'm really a great guy, you know, one of the "good guys". Well, I do believe there is someone for me somewhere, and it will happen. Thanks again for your advice it helped me make the best of a negative situation. Rick
loveable gave this response on 7/10/2000:
Rick,
I'm sorry to hear it didn't go over as well as you might have thought it would. Yet look it as a learning experience, and to know that there is someone ten times better than she could of been.
You just haven't met the right person, yet if you keep dating you will eventually find her. It was your first date in a while, so go out and hove some more fun to find the perfect woman for you.
All you have to do is be yourself, relax, and know you don't have to rush into love. Its something that shouldn't be taken lightly or taken advantage of!
Good luck, Loveable
Let me know on future events.
rvh807735 asked this follow-up question on 7/11/2000:
Lovable, Thanks for the encouragement...they say confidence is sexy and mine can use a boost. I don't give up easily, I will be in touch. Rick
loveable gave this response on 7/12/2000:
Thanks Rick, for your kind remark. I hope the best for you in your adventures of dating.
Loveable :)
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