Anonymous asked this question on 7/3/2000:

I am from the old school of romance. I love to pamper, flatter, build up, and otherwise spoil my lady. However, I have found the more I do such things, the more puzzling the ralationship becomes.

One day she will call me 8-10 times, and the next day I may hear from her once.

I try not to call her at work, and allow her to call me at nights. She is a high maintenance woman, so to speak, and is always doing her nails, her facial, her hair, her whatever women do and I hate to interrupt her. Ours is not a new relationship either.

I hate playing games. I guess I wear my heart on my sleeve and have not guarded my heart. I do love her, and she says she loves me. Is seems that all the women "friends" I have mention how they are mistreated and ignored by their guy friends, and they keep going back for more.

Why can't a guy just be himself and be nice anymore?

mitchelr gave this response on 7/10/2000:

It is OK to be nice to a lady..The problem comes if you are to nice to quickly..With women it has to be a gradual process. Some women sadly enough view a nice guy as weak or easy to capture. They want a conquest. Men who are true men are givers up front. Women are late bloomers. So to much attention up front goes againist the norm of what most women expect. They are strange to figure out. One lady I was showering to much attention on was taking me for granted. I backed off and rarely communicated with her. It scared her that she might be losing me and did a about face in how she treated me. Hey us guys know better most of the time. But we do catch ourselves making the same mistake with a woman. I don`t like games either. It is just trying to find the right lady then progress slowly. Like you are going thru a mine field. If you make it to the other side, the reward will be worth the effort...Wish you the best with your lady...MitchelrRN.

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