Anonymous asked this question on 7/12/2000:

I dated this guy for a couple of months over the course of which I lost my virginity to him. before school ( college) got out for the summer I showed up and basically asked what the deal was. He seemed to be pretty honest and basically said he wasn't ready for a serious relationship because of his ex. and that He was going to europe. After the talk I spent the night and went to leave the next morning and he was like come here.. and we kissed. Since then we haven't talked because he refuses too. I also found out that after he got back from europe.. He had sex with his ex again, which he referred to as a whore.. and is going after his professor's daughter. I don't know why I can't seem to let go .. and don't really understand why he couldn't have just said "were done" and left it at that. Instead of hanging up the phone on me, when I call to talk. On top of which I feel stupid for falling for him because he seems like such a player and that I never meant anything to him.

erin1000 gave this response on 7/13/2000:

Sounds like this guy isn't over his ex, although that may not mean he still loves her. He may very well care about you a lot, so much in fact, it scares him. Men have a tendency to flee if they have been hurt in the past, or are carrying some other "baggage" along with them. New feelings may be too much to handle.

As for going after his professor's daughter, he may be trying to prove something to himself. This is not a man you want to be involved with. He is being selfish at the expense of other people's feelings.

I'm sure his behavior toward you is not about YOU at all. It's hard not to wonder what you may have done wrong, but this is not about you. I suggest you try to move on. In time, you will meet someone else. For now, focus on yourself and your needs.