Anonymous asked this question on 7/13/2000:

I'm a 30 year-old, female real estate agent who works in a affluent area, selling condo's out of a building that's just converted. I myself live in a middle-class area with my father. I meet alot of well-to-do men, because I'm attractive. However once I tell them I still live at home, they get turned off, or treat me in a condensing way. I do pay my father rent, and own my own vehicle, I'm also practically debt free. I do plan on moving out, once I have enough savings & downpayment. If I meet someone in the meanwhile, should I lie? Or avoid the subject?

shrink4u gave this response on 7/13/2000:

Dear Anonymous,

I don't think your living arrangements and/or finances are anybody's business!! For what it's worth, I think you're doing great with both!!

I suggest you don't volunteer any information along this line until you have become really close to someone and know them really well. A close friend and/or lover won't really care where or how you live, or whether or not you pay rent. I think that if someone can't see past such superficial things about you - that's HIS problem!! He'll probably never know what he's missing!

Be confident about the choices you've made. Accept your situation for what it is and let others do the same. I don't think you'd be interested in a man (in the long run) who "can't see the forest for the trees." That is, you sound like a beautiful person, both inside and out, and that's what really matters! You're doing what's best for you at this point, so there's absolutely no reason to be defensive.

Take care, Anonymous, and best wishes!!

Love, Mary