jodiann64 asked this question on 5/8/2000:
What do you do when a family member accuses you of abuse but actually its the other way around. And no matter who you talk to it is a totall waist of time because you have a bad tracct record for things that you have done in the past. But not only are you suffering but your children are suffering also.
sherbie gave this response on 5/11/2000:
dear jodi :0) hello my name is sherbie and i just want to tell you what i did when in a similar situation. when i was 10 years old my older cousin who is a female(so am i), sexually assaulted me with a screwdriver. it was not until i began talking to the school guidance counsellor(7 years later) that i finally confided that information. i told her what happened and she told my mother. no one in my family believed me because i was a kid and i was supposedly "fine" for 7 years with no symptoms. i was in and out of hospitals for depression and suicide attempts and my life was a huge mess!! everyone just said i was crazy and ignored the problem.. my cousin denied everything saying i actually "came on to her". THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT THERE IS HELP!!!!! The #1 thing that put me back on track was THERAPY THERAPY THERAPY... i cannot emphasis that enough... i think that the whole world should be in therapy! i know many people are hesitant as if going to counselling was some sort of weakness, when actually it is the strongest thing you can do to help yourself when you cant really help yourself. Therapists are there to listen to you, to believe you, and to be your advocate. at the beginning my therapist was my only support system, and she carried me out of the mess that was my life!! I know finding the right therapist is NOT EASY!!! i went through 3 therapists before i finally found beth, believe me it was well worth the wait!! One thing to remember is not to let whoever is mentally abusing you to give you any crap about seeking help... get as far away as them as possible, and surround yourself with people who support and believe you... that is not easy if you are like me and didnt have a huge amount of friends(quality friends), if you cant escape the rumors and all other BS going around.. pick up your kids and GET OUT!! Go as far as you need to to get away from the immediate danger, but remember that no matter how far you go you cant out run yourself, so try to get a therapist to help you pick up the pieces. Sorry for going so long, i will leave you with some contact people to help!! ***www.iTherapyMaryland.com*** (email beth @ iTherapy@msn.com, and tell her i gave you the address :0)) ...if $ is an issue... contact ***www.silenttears.org*** (free service for victims of Dom.Violence) ***your local health dept.***
If you need absolutely anything email me any time @ sherbie@email.com... if you email me i will give u my home phone #
:0) sherbie
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