Anonymous asked this question on 4/19/2000:
Is it ever o.k. to have someone hit you? I know it is a stupid question but it's like I know certain things are going to piss my boyfriend off but sometimes I feel like I should be able to do whatever I want. I know that if I talk back or cuss at him that he might slap me in my mouth but sometimes I still do it.Does that make since? And the other stupid part is have the time I find myself saying sorry for him hitting me. I'm not stupid, actully I'm a straigt A college student. I even tell myself that I'm not going to do anything to piss him off but sometimes I still do. Don't tell me to get away from him, because I love him and I feel lonely without him but I just want him to treat me better. I want him to stop yelling at me, I don't like being scared of my boyfriend and I hate that almost everyone knows that he has hit me before. But I do not want to loss him. I don't think he would ever hurt me hurt me. Maybe scare me leave a couple of marks but not kill me. I know it sounds stupid but I really do believe it's true. They say you can't change those who don't want to be changed so what can I do to make it right?
kruck gave this response on 4/24/2000:
The first thing I want to ask you is: Do you value his life over your own? Is this what love feels like? I can see you are in a torrid relationship, however until you relize this what are your options? You may continue to feel that you love him, but love does not hurt. Support, emotional and kindness is what should be in your life. Why do you think you deserve to be hit, yelled at or any of the other things you are dealing with? Go to the mirror in your house and look at yourself. What do you see? After you ansewer these questions I believe you will begin to see that you deserve wonderful treatment, not abuse. You know already that you can not change the abuser, you can only change your life. Don't give up on you.
The average rating for this answer is 3.