Anonymous asked this question on 4/20/2000:
My ex-husband refuses to let me get on with my life. He was emotionally abusive while we were married but became physically abusive after I left. He has seen Dr's and been an out patient a couple of times since we seperated but he still can not accept the fact that I left. He has threatened suicide a couple of times and has stalked, beaten, raped and taped me over the last year. I want his family to get involved and try to help him because I believe that he feels like no one loves him and by his family not getting involved it is just making him more desperate to try to keep me. He wants to be loved more than anything else I think that is why he won't let go. He thinks everyone he ever loved has left him so he thinks he can stop me. Do you know of any programs or ca you suggest what needs done?
wwnelsonfive11 gave this response on 4/21/2000:
Anonymous:
Please listen to this! You are in a dangerous situation and you need help getting out of it.
Forget about trying to help him, or having his relatives help him. If he does continue to go to counseling he is just going to "play the game". Not until he's in a position where he HAS to get help!
You need to get some help for yourself. Contact an abuse hot-line in your area and get yourself educated! They can give you alot of options such as legal help and ways to protect yourself.
One of those ways is to force the issue with him. Restraining orders can be effective tools....if you know how to use them to your benefit. But the legal system is probably your best bet. Learn how to use it. It isn't perfect, but people on the hot-lines can help you.
Also, get into a help group with others who have been through or are going through what you are going through. You can find these groups through the hot-line as well. If there isn't one in your area....start one. Get your attorney (yes, you do need one) involved as well.
These are drastic measures, sure. But you are not going to be safe until you do something for YOURSELF! Please protect yourself!
William
wwnelsonfive11 gave this follow-up answer on 4/21/2000:
Anonymous:
I would like for you to keep us informed of what's going on with this situation. If you'd like, I would welcome any private questions or comments from you.
God Bless you,
William
The average rating for this answer is 4.9.
Anonymous rated this answer a 5.