Anonymous asked this question on 4/5/2000:

I have a boyfriend, we have been together a year now, and I love him very much, but there is just something I am not sure about, this is a problem, let me explain, Everytime that I have money, I like to buy myself something nice, but when he knows this he asks for something too, he will pick something like a child in a candy store, I tell him I was going to buy me something with it, he says"It is only $50, besides I gave you money last time to spend, and I'm taking you to dinner. But for some reason I always have to give money. I hate this, what can I do??? Any help will be appreciated.

wwnelsonfive11 gave this response on 4/6/2000:

Dear Anonymous:

I don't know how old you and your boyfriend are. However, this sounds like a maturity problem. Maturity is simply the ability of a person to relate to and be concerned with the welfare of others. A baby is usually completly concerned with itself. A child starts learning about the importance of others and their needs, but usually the childs needs are paramount. As the child gets into their teens they usually have increased interest in the needs of others. As we become adults, the focus should shift to satisfying the needs of others as well as ourselves.

Again, I'm not sure just where in this time-frame you and your boyfriend are. If it is early, I would suggest discussing this with him. If it is in the time-frame that he should be fully adult....mature...I would consider this a red flag. I would be concerned about whether he truly cares for you. In any case, I would suggest caution. OK?

Good luck,

William

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