Anonymous asked this question on 4/5/2000:

I have a boyfriend, we have been together a year now, and I love him very much, but there is just something I am not sure about, this is a problem, let me explain, Everytime that I have money, I like to buy myself something nice, but when he knows this he asks for something too, he will pick something like a child in a candy store, I tell him I was going to buy me something with it, he says"It is only $50, besides I gave you money last time to spend, and I'm taking you to dinner. But for some reason I always have to give money. I hate this, what can I do??? Any help will be appreciated.

d_ottr gave this response on 4/6/2000:

Anonymous,

Always remember- you don't HAVE to do anything. This person is not a dependant, and should certainly have his own resources. It seems rather arrogant on his part to plead for gifts; a gift is supposed to come from the heart, not compulsion. If you don't feel like buying him something, just say NO! You work for your sustenance, so should he. Granted, he calims he buys dinner, and might give you money on occasion, but that is what's known as women's perogative. He SHOULD; you don't HAVE TO! I understand your feelings, but you should realize that this is a step in a progression of controlling behavior that one day will no doubt harm the relationship you today question. Good luck, and think with your head on this one, not your heart.