capntom asked this question on 4/3/2000:

Evening Xperts,I was just wondering, it appears to me that there seems to be a large segment of the people who ask us questions are women with abusive boyfriends or husbands. My question is why do women insist in staying in abusive enviroments. My job during the day is working in a Salvation Army Shelter as the director of security with A daily flow of 1100 clients, it boggles my mind when i watch these women get tormented by their mates, Yet they stay and take it

johnrecover gave this response on 4/4/2000:

The most significant thing I see in these situations is the length of the conditioning that the females take to become emotionally confused in order to accept the abuse on the level they do. What I see as a problem is that agencies work so hard to get these women away from these relationships, which I agree with, but what they offer them in return does not compare to what they just got out of. I am talking about financial stability here and the desire to survive and the fear that holds these women back from surviving on their own. I believe that they return for a small pieceo of stability and they risk a lifetime of misery to have it. The attitude of willing to settle for 5 minutes of pleasure and a lifetime of misery seems to prevail in these types of situations. Thanks, John

The average rating for this answer is 5.

capntom rated this answer a 5.