Anonymous asked this question on 3/28/2000:

Lately my boyfriend and I have been getting along so-so it angers him that when he calls I am either not home or to far to hear the phone, he talls me that I better be here at a certain time because he hates waiting, and this is so weird because he is so sweet, but his emotional outbursts are a problem.

wwnelsonfive11 gave this response on 4/2/2000:

Please be aware that many abusers are know as "sweet" or "kind" by the abused and by their friends. Abusers come in several different catagories. One is the person who gets his way by force. They, often, have been spoiled or driven by his parents. Another type would be a person with low self esteme who feels inadiquate in his/her relationships. This person will use the "sweet" approach to manipulate their way close to others. But they don't feel confident about keeping that relationship. And, they NEED that relationship! So they use CONTROL to force the relationship to be what they need it to be.

Please be very wary of this kind of relationship. Suggest that this person get help and then GET OUT of it. Don't try to be a helper. They need professional counseling!

wwnelsonfive11 gave this follow-up answer on 4/2/2000:

He will use every one of his manipulative weapons to keep the relationship going. Even guilt. But, don't get dragged into it. You need to consider that dating is a natural way to get to know others as potential marraige partners. You need to get together with those who can truly provide you with the love you desire. And there are many of those out there.

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