Anonymous asked this question on 1/12/2000:

My Question:

What would you do to handle a situation concerning a family member who is so far behind on child support that he is literally at sea hiding out from the police?

I would hate to see him in prison, he just isn't the type to survive, being somewhat unaware of reality and with a slightly sarcastic attitude and mouth, I am sure he would be dead or hurting seriously through major beatings. He seems to me a bit naive in a sense concerning social circumstances, and I want to protect him, but at the same time this cannot go on forever so I feel like pushing the issue by letting the authorities know of his whereabouts and making him face the esponsibility he has, also I am sure a judge would understnad he cannot afford to pay it all at once, this is the main reason he is hiding out...he is afraid of a theory that he has that no judge will give him a chance to work it out through payments and a strict probation, he is sure they will just arbitrarily throw him away and discard the key while he is behind bars. I wish he would come forward because my sense of duty not only to the law but also to the child makes me a little bit angry with him for not dealing with this and instead running away like he was a child himself. I feel guilty for even thinking of turning him in, but then again I do not have to do it...yet if I did it would bother me forever don't you think? He would know it was me too because I am the only one in the family that knows his whereabouts.

How would I deal with the wrath of the family as well? he would hate me forever and turn everyone against me.

Please help, I am truly at a loss on this, and also it is beginning to affect my health, I can't sleep anymore and sometimes I feel like I can't breathe.

sojourner1 gave this response on 1/21/2000:

Convince your brother to retain a lawyer (he may be able to get a legal services lawyer free or cheap) to work a deal with the local prosecutor to allow him to turn himself in in exchange for a judgement he can live with. The attorney is bound by attorney/client confidentiality and cannot tell the authorities your brother's whereabouts if he instructs the attorney not to and the attorney won't get in trouble for not telling. This is probably the best way to get him back and taking care of his responsibility with the least risk of jail time. He's going to get caught and the meter is running on his obligation to his child. You're a good aunt to care.

The average rating for this answer is 5.

Anonymous rated this answer a 5.