"peter legge" <peter.legge@btinternet.com> wrote in message news:bu4grb$b8r$1@hercules.btinternet.com... > If the Bible tells us of a universal flood that covered all the highest
> mountains by at least 25 feet then so it was.
> To talk about Mt.Everest is rediculous because it didn't exist before
the > flood.
> The Bible talks about water above the heavens and this was water vapour to
> the calculated thickness of 9 miles deep which before the flood protected
> the earth from the sun's harmful rays to such an extent that men lived
until > they were nearly 1000 years old in some cases. (Look up the age of
> |Methusaleh in Genesis).
> If you want a good book to read about the Genesis Flood then read the
book > "The Genesis Flood". Well written by scientists who are also Bible
believing > Christians.
> Please be careful when you make little of what the Bible tells you.
>

Let me see if I understand this story. One old man and his three sons built a wooden boat the size of an aircraft carrier, despite the fact that wood isn't strong enough for that--a wooden boat that size it would collapse under its own weight. Oh, and they did this in the middle of a desert, where there IS NO WOOD.

And then one old man and his three sons got either two or seven living specimens (depending on whether the animal was kosher or not) of every living species of animal on Earth. Somehow he did this, living in ancient Israel four or five thousand years ago. Somehow he got penguins, and kept them from dying of heatstroke in the desert, and polar bears too, and kangaroos, and grizzly bears, and spiders and snakes and scorpions. He got specimens of all living animal and bird species from all over the planet Earth and somehow kept them from dying of heat, or cold, or thirst, or heatstroke, and he kept them from eating each other. And this ark--which, vast though it was, wasn't even large enough to have room for a single breeding pair of every species of INSECT known to exist today--also had enough food on it for all these animals. Right? Got that? Let's continue.

And then the just and loving Creator of the Universe exterminated all land-dwelling life on Earth because he objected to the sexual behavior that went on in certain cities--because of this he killed babies, old people, animals, birds, everything. He did this with a mysterious flood, with mysterious waters that came from nowhere, were so high that they were over the tops of the highest mountains in the world (five miles high--that means water was five miles deep or more all over the Earth's surface), then these mysterious flood waters vanished again leaving no trace and there's not even a trace of this vast flood in the fossil record or the geological record, even though in geological terms 5000 years is an eyeblink and the world would be filthy with evidence of it all.

Also this mysterious flood did all this without diluting the salt concentration in the Earth's oceans so far that the salt-water fish would die. And all the salt washed into freshwater lakes and rivers by the mystery global flood didn't kill all the fresh-water fish.

Still with me? There's more and you haven't seen anything yet. It gets BETTER, ladies and germs. After the Ark came to rest and the flood waters receded, God made a rainbow for Noah and the kids. It was the first rainbow in the history of the universe, because evidently up until that point raindrops in the Earth's atmosphere did not refract sunlight and separate it into its component colors.

And, of course, once released from the Ark all these animals marched down the gangplank peacefully and walked tens of thousands of miles, most of them also having to swim across thousands of miles of ocean on the way, to get back where they were supposed to be. They even managed to go in the right directions--no polar bears went south, no penguins went north. They did this without the polar bears and penguins dying of heatstroke in the desert. And they all went inerrantly back where they were supposed to be, the hundreds of species of bats, and the lemurs, and the storks, and the mice, and the voles, and the chimpanzees, and the meerkats, and the elephants, and the squirrels, and the crocodiles, and dozens of species of wasps, and so on, all of them. The lions, tigers, and grizzly bears also refrained from eating all of the kangaroos and deer and wildebeests the moment they were let out of the Ark, despite the fact that it must have been a long and hungry trip for them.

But wait, THERE'S MORE. All living land-dwelling species on Earth are descended from populations of just one breeding pair, or just a few breeding pairs, about five thousand years ago. Including humans--all breeds and types of humanity, in all their variations and diversity, are descended from fewer than a dozen people less than six thousand years ago. Pygmies, Laplanders, Amerinds, the Chinese, European whites, the Bantu, the Hindustanis, all of them. All the vast differences in language, in culture, in physical anthropology, all appeared in that interval between the Great Flood, supposedly 5000 years ago, and the dawn of recorded history--which was, uh, about six thousand years ago. D'OH!

Is this it? Is this the literal truth from the literally true Bible which is God's inerrant word? Is this the idiotic horseshit you feeble-minded redneck goobers are trying to sell me? And you believe this yourselves? Word for word? Is this it?

You should be ashamed of yourselves.

Thanks to Guest_04425 at bestandworst.com