frankmon asked this question on 7/11/2000:

I've been dating this guy for 5 months now. Recently he decided he just wants to be friends, because he is not ready for a relationship right now. he says that I made him the happiest he had ever been, but it's all him and nothing about me? We still see each other and enjoy each others company, but I am confused and don't know what to do.

LadyMara gave this response on 7/12/2000:

Hello Frankmon....

Well, it might just be exactly what he said..... OR it could be just as innocent. I'll give you an example..... I am attracted to tall dark haired men. So, say I become close friends with someone who is shorter than I am and blond. There might be no attraction whatsoever, but I might love him as a dear and wonderful friend. If there is no "chemistry" there is just no chemistry. There is nothing that you or he can do about it. If you feel something for him, you might have to just continue to be friends and hope that maybe someday he will notice you in that way and return your feelings.

I have several male friends who I have wonderful times with. I do not have to brag to say that I show my friends wonderful times! Sometimes girlfriends do not believe that there is nothing going on! But true friendship can be that close.

Don't worry about having more.....if it ever DID evolve into something MORE than friends you would still want the base of your relationship to be true, best friends!! Don't discount the friendship...... And ask him exactly how he feels and what he means, and be honest at all times about your own feelings and motives!! Nothing less will work!!

Good luck! I will pray for you.

love,

LadyMara

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