frankmon asked this question on 7/11/2000:

I've been dating this guy for 5 months now. Recently he decided he just wants to be friends, because he is not ready for a relationship right now. he says that I made him the happiest he had ever been, but it's all him and nothing about me? We still see each other and enjoy each others company, but I am confused and don't know what to do.

wehavealotincommon gave this response on 7/11/2000:

Hi, sounds like you want a serious relationship with this guy. I'll be frank here. It could be one of two things: he has a fear of commitment or he considers you a "good enough for now girl". If you haven't heard that term, that is a girl who is nice to keep company with but NOT the one he wants to marry. If you want marriage, I would break it off now. If you are okay with this, then continue but don't get caught in the trap of trying to "change" yourself so that he will fall in love with you. You don't give a lot of information, so I could be wrong. It is something only you can really decide. Take care. Hope things work out the best for you!

wehavealotincommon gave this follow-up answer on

7/11/2000: Hi, I see you didn't like my answer and you like the answers that tell you to hang in there and give him space. Since you have only been dating him 5 months, you are probably more inclined to hang in there. My suggestion would be to give yourself a date in the future where you will assess the relationship and if you are getting from it what you need. I have known people who have spent literally years waiting for "him" to move to commitment. Believe me when a man wants to be with just you forever, there is no hesitation but rather urgency to make it permanent. Best of luck to you and give it a little time.

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