Anonymous asked this question on 7/11/2000:

Help, I'm a twenty-year old female and I've been with about 8 guys in my life time. All have different sizes and styles, The problem is no matter how good the sex is or how much I feel for the person or how good the person is orally or even how thick and long the person is I WILL NOT HAVE AN ORGASM. What's wrong could I possibly have some kind of sexual disfuncntion, I mean I'm supposed to be in my peak or at least experiencing all kinds of pleasures, what can I do??? I feel like I'm the only person who has not climaxed. HElP

DLM4u gave this response on 7/11/2000:

This is frustrating I am sure. First, my question would be: Do you know how to pleasure your self. In order to allow another to help you reach orgasm, you need to know what it feels like and how to reach it yourself. Many of my female friends have confided in me that a man has never been able to bring them to orgasm. I read in a self help book once that every woman's clitorus is positioned differently. Depending if it is positioned extremly high or extremely low (close to vaginal hole), made the difference of whether a woman could orgasm while having sex with a man. If you learn how to stimulate yourself then you will know how to teach a man to stimulate you also. Try these suggestions: #1. A good start is too buy a massager or a vibrator and experiment. (I am married and have a vibrator tucked underneath my bed on my side.)

#2. Once you learn how to stimulate your own body, you can find out if a man can also do it. (A lot of women can't orgasm in front of a man because they can't relax enough to let their bodies go through with its natural process.)

Take it easy and give your self time. Sometimes a little music, a little k-Y jelly, and a good fantacy or romance novel could be helpful.

I know you will achieve your goal, and remember don't give up if it doesn't happen the first time you try.

-Dena