Anonymous asked this question on 7/11/2000:

Help, I'm a twenty-year old female and I've been with about 8 guys in my life time. All have different sizes and styles, The problem is no matter how good the sex is or how much I feel for the person or how good the person is orally or even how thick and long the person is I WILL NOT HAVE AN ORGASM. What's wrong could I possibly have some kind of sexual disfuncntion, I mean I'm supposed to be in my peak or at least experiencing all kinds of pleasures, what can I do??? I feel like I'm the only person who has not climaxed. HElP

SeekTrueLove gave this response on 7/11/2000:

Dear Anonymous,

I wouldn't be too alarmed. There are lots of women in this world who have never had an orgasm. It sometimes just doesn't happen for them.

There are some women who can climax only through oral sex or direct clitorol stimulation. Then there are some who can only orgasm through sexual intercourse. So all women differ in their sexual responses.

Also, although you may feel like this is the peak of your sexual experiences, this is simply not true. Many women reach a peak of sexuality well into their thirties, and they keep on learning throughout their lives. Why? Practice and experience. They have learned how to make the most of their own (and partner's) sexual pleasure. They have learned to take control of their own orgasms. You CANNOT solely rely on just your partner.

So having said that, I have to ask whether you have been able to bring yourself to orgasm (ie. masterbation). You know what feels good for you, and you have total control. If you have tried to masterbate to orgasm, and still have had no success then it could be a physiological problem. Check it out with your doctor.

Are you a smoker? Do you have high blood pressure? I read a study that said that a person's sexual response to pleasure can be dampened due to constricted blood vessels which can be due to smoking and/or hypertension. Again, a physiological reason.

Hope this helps.

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