Anonymous asked this question on 7/10/2000:

I'm 24 and my boyfriend is 29. We've been dating for a little over a year and plan to get married. We've been friends for 10 years, and dated very briefly when I was 16 (he broke my heart pretty bad).

now that you know the background, here is the problem. I found out a couple days ago that he "made out" with 2 girls at the same time. I've met them before, and it's possible that'll meet them again. I think if it didn't happen in a public place, that it would have gone further.

I'll make it clear that we weren't dating at the time, just friends. I can't figure out why it bothers me so much. He's a great guy, and claims that he couldn't have sex with someone without there being emotion involved. This just seems to uncharacteristic(?) of him.

Why does this bother me so much and how can I get over it?

Silvrain gave this response on 7/11/2000:

Well, if you weren't with him at the time...then it isn't cheatin. But! He said that he couldn't be with anyone he didn't have feelings for, right? Well, he lied to you there. He was with someone else, two people, that he didn't have feelings for. It bothers you for the same reason it bothers me to think of my Hubby's ex-girls. You don't like the picture of it in your head. And frankly, no one would. I say you come forward to him, and express your feelings. If he says anything other than, "Iam sorry" or "I was wrong", then it is time to get rid of him. He may not have cheated, but he still lied to you. And I say once a liar, always a liar.

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