Anonymous asked this question on 7/10/2000:

Me and many girlfriend have been together for nearly 18 months. She has been deep in Love with me and wanted to spend her life with me.

I Love her as well but I asked for some space in the beginning of June. I asked for that space because I couldnt see how she was transmitting her feelings for me as it wasnt obvious.

2 days later i didnt want that space as i had realised that she has been showing her feelings for me in her own way which she is comfertable with. But she said that she doesnt know if she can trust me with her feelings and that what if next time i break up for good..so now she wanted space to sort her head out.

I wrote her a long letter confirming my true love for her so after 3 weeks we met 2-3 times...got on...kissed and cuddled. But we still hadnt talked about the situation and sorted things out...

The other day we talked and she told me that she does still Love me but doesnt feel the same powerful love as she did before i asked for some space. She said that she is now not clear about whether i am the man she wants to spend her life with. She does want to sort things out and does hope that things will be ok.

I told her that she cant go back into that powerful love again overnight...it will take time. She understood that and said that 'we'll see how things go'.

So please can you tell me: what can i do to make her fall more in love with me again, as she was before ?

What should i avoid doing ?

Thanks in Advance

male_stripper38 gave this response on 7/10/2000:

ok, here's what I'm seeing, you really have very strong feelings for her, and you would do anything for her, right? Ok, if I was you, I would try to think of it this way... back off alot, but not all the way, if you back off all the way, it might back fire on you, but if you don't back off from her, it may end up breaking you and her up... that might be the reason that she has lost some of the feelings, have you ever herd of the saying, "Let it go, and if it never come's back to you, then it was never ment to be, and if it dose come back to you, then it's always ment to be!" Well, that is very trule... and that is what I Advise you to do, but like I said, don't let her go all the way... Let me put this in a way that you may understand, Say that it's you that is trying to short things out, and she won't give you Space, and you are really getting eartated from that, and you might have just said Forget it, and break up with her, right? Well, it go's both ways, just think about what she is feeling right now... and if possable, try to help her out in any way possable... but Don't Smother her... I really hope this dose help for you... and another thing, the reason why you shouldn't give her too much space, well sometime's they will start to think of you as a Brother, then she will not have any of the feelings for you as she dose now, anther words, she would think of you as a Brother, and not a Boyfriend. so now you know where I'm comeing from... and I really hope that things work between you and her...

if you have any more qustions, then feel free to ask me...

Your Advisor,

Ryan