Eating The Forbidden Fruit

By Curtis Johnson

-=> Quoting Darryl Gonzalez to All <=-

DG> God said, "Don't eat this", and they ate it.
DG> Which of you would not punish your own children for
DG> eating something you told them not to?

Some disgustingly lax parents would think that eating food with horrible effects would be its own punishment.

Me, I had to raise two fraternal siblings, brother and sister, all by my lonesome because I needed some help in the vegetable patch out back. When they were still young enough not to know right from wrong, and not to even know what death was because they hadn't seen anything die, I put a plate of cookies in front of them and told them that they'd die if they ate it, and then I left and stayed away for a while.

Well, they told me that a dog came along and wolfed one of the cookies. And the girl claimed that the dog barked to her that it was OK, that I hadn't poisoned the cookies. (I'm not that kind of parent, you know.) So she ate it, and then talked her brother into it.

Now, what parent likes being disobeyed? When I walked inside the door and saw the missing cookies, I kicked them out into the wilderness where they could have incest with each other, and posted a guard to shoot them if they came back. The dog? I cut off his legs.

The neighbors tell me I showed Godly love.

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