Revenge picket report June 24,2000 FRice: Neighborhood Hero

From: (Shy David
Subject: Revenge picket report June 24,2000 FRice: Neighborhood Hero
Date: Mon, 26 Jun 2000 23:15:54 GMT
Organization: Worldwide Church of WWW.XENU.NET
Message-ID: <>

When we came back from protesting the death of Ashlee Shaner at "Gold Base" (my nephews: "Uncle David! I want to picket with you tomorrow! Can I please!"), we were very amused and pleased to see a very odd character outside Fredric's residence "picketing" him. Since there is no side walk, the odd fellow was walking up and down the middle of the street--- litterally. Our vehicle turned the corner and THERE HE WAS right at our vehicle's front bumper, only three or four feet away. Since it is a 'blind turn," we were only going 2 or 3 miles per hour, so it was easy to avoid him (many children play in the street, so people are usually very cautious at this turn).

Fredric yelled out "Hey! Allllll riiiiiiiiight! This is great!" and stoped the van in the road so that the family could leap out and talked to the odd creature picketing.

I call this odd fellow "Scarecrow."

The smallest family member (8 or 9 years old) ran up to Scarecrow and right out of the blue (with no coaching or anything) demanded to take the free personality test. "Oh! May I *PLEASE* take the free personality test! [whining, pleading, mocking voice] I wanna be clear! Can I *PLEASE?!*" while smirking at him. When you've been smired at by a 9-year-old, you KNOW that you have been royally *SMIRKED* at!

The adults and older children ran up to save this non-errant child from harm. I tried hard not to laugh at the "free personality test" pleadings, but it was too damn funny. By the time I stoped laughing, I had whiped out OT3 and gone in to BunkerTech(tm)(r)(c) and restimulated the odd clam's engrams. Volcanos; H-bombs; boohoos and weepers; painful jaw; the whole BunkerTech(tm)(r)(c) routine.

I keep writing "odd fellow" because this guy was even odder looking than I am--- which, if you've ever seen me, is indeed odd. My heart went out to him: he was definately the runt of the litter. It was around 35 degrees (95F) and the guy had no hat, no shade, no sun glasses, no discernable water container, and it looked like the hide was being peeled from his face. I offered to run and fetch for him a can of cold soda but he declined. The way he was walking (as if in pain or in a heat-induced stupor) gave me some cause for concern for him, but he was a Real Trooper and struggled through with the FootBulleting(tm)(r)(c). While I look like a mixture of Albert Einstien and LRong Hubbard, this picketer looked like "The Scarecrow" in the movie "The Wizzard of Oz." Much the same face, only his was puckered and stained from the day's sun.

Fredric's neighbors know all about Scientology, as Fredric often tells his neighbors about Scientology and why Fredric pickets them. He also explains why the crime syndicate sends odd jokers out to picket his empty residence. The support Fredric has received from his neighbors has been extremely favorable. Fredric is considered a hero by a few of his neighbors, and as a civic-minded, liberal humanitarian from other neighbors.

So Scarecrow had six laughing, joking fans walking with him while he picketed: Fredric, spouse, three kids, and myself. He did not seem like a happy camper, but what can yah do? He clenched his teeth and plodded slowly on, up and down the middle of the street, "Religious Bigot" sign tilted at a rakish angle in his weak grip.

Suddenly 'fore our wonderous eyes what doth we spy? Yet two more picketers walking into the street! WAY COOL! More restimulation! More "PC- to- OT8- In- Twenty- Seconds- Tech(tm)(r)(c)!" Scarecrow looked very happy to see them. The odds suddenly went from twenty-to-one against him (counting neighbors), to thirty-to-three against. Yes, the additional picketers drew more supportive neighbors out! One neighbor called to Fredric "Hey Fred!" and when Fredric turned to look, the neighbor have him TWO THUMBS UP and a big grin.

The two new picketers (call them "Nice Friendly Guy" and "I'm Ashamed to be a Scientologist") met up with Scarecrow and told Scarecrow that they were supposed to leave. The two new picketers spent all of 20 seconds picketing: "I'm Ashamed to be a Scientologist" had a picket sign; "Nice Friendly Guy" did not. "I'm Ashamed to be a Scientologist" looked rather emanciated: she was very tall and thin and looked like she could use a hearty meal--- just like Scarecrow. "Nice Friendly Guy" was healthy, happy, and the guy in charge of the other two (in my opinion). I guess the starving picketers were regged by the well-fed one.

The entire circus therefore walked down the street. (A few neighbors waved good-bye and went back in doors.) We walked with the picketers to their pick-up, and while we were asking them questions ("Can you say 'Xenu?' Or is it 'Xemu?'"), I tapped Fredric on the arm and then pointed to the pick-up's liscence plate. Fredric wiped out his camera to take a photograph, and discovered that his camera was out of film! LOL! That cracked me up.

Fredric then started to yell "Stand in front of their car! I gotta load my camera!" while he fumbled frantically with camera, tape recorder, old film canister, new film canister, and the new film's container (which he had to open with the remaining free finger). I countermanded Fred's "get run-over tech" and told every one to NOT stand in front of the pick-up. Duhh! :-)

Just before the picketers drove away I asked them to come back tomorrow (Sunday) and we would have iced-tea for them, and perhaps some freshly baked cookies. We would have a tea party! They seemed unmoved by this offer.

They drove off up the street. They turned around a bend in the road, then stoped and backed up, coming back to us. Then a picketer got out and into a second car---- Fredric and children took off running up to this second car (new film now in camera), to snap a picture of that car's liscence plate. (Note to Fredric: lose 20 pounds and try again.)

Walking back to Fredric's residence, a few neighbors came out to congradulate him, shake his hand, laugh, share stories, and generaly build Good Community. One neighbor walked up to me and asked "Who ARE those freaks?!" And I said "Scientologists." He said "Ahhhhh! Okay. That explains it!" and went back to his house.

A few neighbors asked about "The latest Scientology crimes," so Fredric explained to them about Ashlee Shaner and why we were at the crime syndicate's "Nazi Theme Park" (thanks Grady!). One neighbor invited the entire entheta crew over a barbeeque dinner that evening, but I had other entheta business at LAX (wink wink nudge nudge).

All in all a very good day!


"There is madmen in the world and there are terror." --- George W. Bush
"My hands ARE fucking up!" --- Bob Minton, Great Clearwater Street Chase
"I want to dance." --- Lisa McPherson, 18 Nov 95