Sunday May 14 05:05 PM EDT

Carnage On the "Battlefield"

The scorched Earth campaign is underway.

As filmmakers defend themselves from any connection between Battlefield Earth and Scientology, the wreck that is the John Travolta flick opened at theaters today, and the reviews are about as ugly as a Psychlo.

The $73 million wannabe sci-fi blockbuster is based on Scientology founder's L. Ron Hubbard's 1982 novel of the same name. The story is set in the year 3000 and follows the invasion of Earth and the enslavement of humans by the nine-foot-tall, oddly coifed Psychlos. Travolta plays Terl, the Psychlo security chief who takes sadistic pleasure in whacking humans. Barry Pepper is the revolution-minded human who wants to topple Terl.

Because of Hubbard and Travolta's association with Scientology, the film has come under scrutiny as critics allege it's just more propaganda for the controversial church.

Last month, an anti-Scientology group named FactNet put out a press release saying Earth "may contain sophisticated subliminal advertising designed by the cult Scientology, to recruit viewers into their cult and influence them to reject psychiatry and other mental health organizations." Then, the pop culture Website iFuse.com ran a story quoting non-Scientologist crew members saying they were creeped out by their L. Ron-following coworkers.

But at every turn Travolta (who also produced the film), director Roger Christian (whose major previous credit was as second-unit director on The Phantom Menace) and even church officials have denied any relation between Earth and Scientology. "There is no connection," Travolta said in a prepared statement. "L. Ron Hubbard wrote numerous science-fiction epics. Other than being created by the same person, the two have virtually nothing to do with one another."

Adds Christian, "First, let me say I'm a Buddhist, not a Scientologist. So don't you think, as the director, if I were going to plant subliminal religious messages, they would probably be rooted in Buddhism?

What this movie is, is a fun ride and that's all," Christian says. "It's a sci-fi film with the feel of Planet of the Apes. John [Travolta] likes to call it a sci-fi Pulp Fiction."

Of course, any controversy might be moot considering the film's notices (some of the worst since, say, Ishtar) might keep even the most devout Scientologist at home.

"A million monkeys with a million crayons would be hard-pressed in a million years to create anything as cretinous as Battlefield Earth," snipes Rita Kempley of the Washington Post.

"Contrary to prior evidence, it is possible to make a popcorn pic too dumb for the peanut gallery... haplessly clichéd dialogue, cardboard characters and dunderheaded plot logic." Variety

"The second, and hopefully last, of John Travolta's Scientology movies, Battlefield Earth, like Phenomenon, is religious propaganda masquerading as sci-fi fun... The dialogue is inane, the acting wooden, and Roger Christian's directing choices are a lesson in sci-fi film cliché." Newsweek

"Sitting through it is like watching the most expensively mounted high school play of all time... Plan Nine from Outer Space for a new generation." New York Times

"Travolta's intergalactic stinkaroo... is nowhere near a great movie. In fact, it's a pretty gruesome mess." Mr. Showbiz, in a zero-star review

"A bloated sci-fi monstrosity...we are now spared the sleepless nights of wondering which gobbler will dominate the next Razzie Awards for worst turkey of the year." Toronto Star

"The more I think about it, the more I suspect that Battlefield Earth was directed by a software program that absorbed and reprocessed the standard sci-fi elements of the past 30 years." Salon.

"Earth is one of the darkest, ugliest, most uninvolving and incomprehensible major-studio fantasies I've ever seen. In it, Travolta... delivers a stupefyingly bad performance." New York Daily News, in another zero-stars review.

"[The script is] deeply dumb, depressingly derivative." USA Today

"In the post-apocalyptic adventure genre, Battlefield Earth makes Waterworld look like a masterpiece." Los Angeles Times

There may be an upshot to the bad reviews, though. As Newsweek says, "[C]ontrary to cult-hater reports, nothing about Battlefield Earth will draw weak movie-goers into the open arms of the Church of Scientology. That would be like saying Showgirls was a recruitment tool for strip clubs."