Psychol Babble:
Battlefield Earth Movie

  • be001.htm Battlefield Earth Review #001
  • be002.htm Battlefield Earth Review #002
  • be003.htm Battlefield Earth Review #003
  • be004.htm Battlefield Earth Review #004

    "You haven't endured pain till you've seen Battlefield Earth." -- Washinton Post

  • be005.htm Battlefield Earth Review #005
  • be006.htm Battlefield Earth Review #006
  • be007.htm Battlefield Earth Review #007
  • be008.htm Battlefield Earth Review #008

    "Outside of marching on Washington in Nazi uniforms while burning crosses and clubbing baby seals, it's hard to think of a worse way to recruit converts than to subject them to this surreal atrocity..."

  • be009.htm Battlefield Earth Review #009
  • be010.htm Battlefield Earth Review #010
  • be011.htm Battlefield Earth Review #011
  • be012.htm Battlefield Earth Review #012

    "Drag queens might like this movie...."

  • be013.htm Battlefield Earth Review #013
  • be014.htm Battlefield Earth Review #014
  • be015.htm Battlefield Earth Review #015
  • be016.htm Battlefield Earth Review #016

    "... this lumbering pile of shit to the silver screen...." -- Seattle Weekly

  • be017.htm Battlefield Earth Review #017
  • be018.htm Battlefield Earth Review #018
  • be019.htm Battlefield Earth Review #019
  • be020.htm Battlefield Earth Review #020

    "There are only so many ways you can say a movie sucks."

  • be021.htm Battlefield Earth Review #021
  • be022.htm Battlefield Earth Review #022
  • be023.htm Battlefield Earth Review #023
  • be024.htm Battlefield Earth Review #024

    "dim-witted slag heap of cinematic detritus"

  • be025.htm Battlefield Earth Review #025
  • be026.htm Battlefield Earth Review #026
  • be027.htm Battlefield Earth Review #027
  • be028.htm Battlefield Earth Review #028

    "Maybe the problems with 'Battlefield Earth' can be traced to the nose plugs John Travolta wore in the film. He couldn't smell the stench."

  • be029.htm Battlefield Earth Review #029
  • be030.htm Battlefield Earth Review #030
  • be031.htm Battlefield Earth Review #031
  • be032.htm Battlefield Earth Review #032

    "A million monkeys with a million crayons would be hard-pressed in a million years to create anything as cretinous as Battlefield Earth. This film version of L. Ron Hubbard's futuristic novel is so breathtakingly awful in concept and execution, it wouldn't tax the smarts of a troglodyte. And when it comes to star John Travolta's performance, well, hammy William Shatner's hairpiece is more convincing." -- Washington Post's Rita Kempley

  • be033.htm Battlefield Earth Review #033
  • be034.htm Battlefield Earth Review #034
  • be035.htm Battlefield Earth Review #035
  • be036.htm Battlefield Earth Review #036

    "Battlefield Earth gives 'disaster movie' a new meaning." -- Hud Nordin

  • be037.htm Battlefield Earth Review #037
  • be038.htm Battlefield Earth Review #038
  • be039.htm Battlefield Earth Review #039
  • be040.htm Battlefield Earth Review #040

    "This is how the world ends. Not with a bang, but with a stinker."

  • be041.htm Battlefield Earth Review #041
  • be042.htm Battlefield Earth Review #042
  • be043.htm Battlefield Earth Review #043
  • be044.htm Battlefield Earth Review #044

    "THE GREAT THING about 'Battlefield Earth' is that you can leave at any time."

  • be045.htm Battlefield Earth Review #045
  • be046.htm Battlefield Earth Review #046
  • be047.htm Battlefield Earth Review #047
  • be048.htm Battlefield Earth Review #048

    "In the year 3000, human beings will be almost extinct, but hair extensions will be plentiful."

  • be049.htm Battlefield Earth Review #049
  • be050.htm Battlefield Earth Review #050
  • be051.htm Battlefield Earth Review #051
  • be052.htm Battlefield Earth Review #052

    "Let's get the boring obituary stuff out of the way first. "Battlefield Earth" doesn't just pass away. It dies. It swigs the Ebola virus as mouthwash during its first turgid, apocalyptic, Planet-of-the-Apes-pilfered minutes, then spends two hours convulsing and frothing on screen until you want to stuff a pillow in its mouth and say: Enough already."

  • be053.htm Battlefield Earth Review #053
  • be054.htm Battlefield Earth Review #054
  • be055.htm Battlefield Earth Review #055
  • be056.htm Battlefield Earth Review #056

    "But for now... BATTLEFIELD EARTH is a log of shit. Look only if you like to stare at shit."

  • be057.htm Battlefield Earth Review #057
  • be058.htm Battlefield Earth Review #058
  • be059.htm Battlefield Earth Review #059
  • be060.htm Battlefield Earth Review #060

    "See, Scientology does destroy lives." -- Steve G.

  • be061.htm Battlefield Earth Review #061
  • be062.htm Battlefield Earth Review #062
  • be063.htm Battlefield Earth Review #063
  • be064.htm Battlefield Earth Review #064

    In Battlefield Earth, the world is almost devoid of human life, much like theaters after word gets out on this dud.

  • be065.htm Battlefield Earth Review #065
  • be066.htm Battlefield Earth Review #066
  • be067.htm Battlefield Earth Review #067
  • be068.htm Battlefield Earth Review #068

    "It looked like it was edited with a weedwacker."

  • be069.htm Battlefield Earth Review #069
  • be070.htm Battlefield Earth Review #070
  • be071.htm Battlefield Earth Review #071
  • be072.htm Battlefield Earth Review #072

    "Movie's Gay!"

  • be073.htm Battlefield Earth Review #073
  • be074.htm Battlefield Earth Review #074
  • be075.htm Battlefield Earth Review #075
  • be076.htm Battlefield Earth Review #076

    "You don't watch it, you survive it." - Denver Post

  • be077.htm Battlefield Earth Review #077
  • be078.htm Battlefield Earth Review #078
  • be079.htm Battlefield Earth Review #079
  • be080.htm Battlefield Earth Review #080

    "I have seen thousands of bad movies in my life, and I think I can easily say Battlefield Earth is one of the very worst by far. Much worse than Congo, much worse than The Haunting, much worse than Batman and Robin[...]" -- OhTheHumanity

  • be081.htm Battlefield Earth Review #081
  • be082.htm Battlefield Earth Review #082
  • be083.htm Battlefield Earth Review #083
  • be084.htm Battlefield Earth Review #084

    "Battlefield Earth should be shown only at maximum-security prisons when a prisoner is tossed in solitary for bad behavior." -Filmcritic.com

  • be085.htm Battlefield Earth Review #085
  • be086.htm Battlefield Earth Review #086
  • be087.htm Battlefield Earth Review #087
  • be088.htm Battlefield Earth Review #088

    "Battlefield Earth is like taking a bus trip with someone who has needed a bath for a long time. It's not merely bad; it's unpleasant in a hostile way." -Roger Ebert

  • be089.htm Battlefield Earth Review #089
  • be090.htm Battlefield Earth Review #090
  • be091.htm Battlefield Earth Review #091
  • be092.htm Battlefield Earth Review #092

    "Battlefield Earth has the feel of a movie made by a precocious 8-year- old with access to too many leftover costumes from Clan of the Cave Bear and Star Trek: The Next Generation." - Citysearch

  • be093.htm Battlefield Earth Review #093
  • be094.htm Battlefield Earth Review #094
  • be095.htm Battlefield Earth Review #095
  • be096.htm Battlefield Earth Review #096

    "Sitting through the summer's first monolithic monstrosity, Battlefield Earth, was one of the most painfully excruciating experiences of my life." - Sacramento Bee

  • be097.htm Battlefield Earth Review #097
  • be098.htm Battlefield Earth Review #098
  • be099.htm Battlefield Earth Review #099
  • be100.htm Battlefield Earth Review #100

    "And after about 20 minutes of this amateurish picture, extinction doesn't seem like such a bad idea." -NY Times

  • be101.htm Battlefield Earth Review #101
  • be102.htm Battlefield Earth Review #102
  • be103.htm Battlefield Earth Review #103
  • be104.htm Battlefield Earth Review #104

    "Kevin Costner should send a thank-you note to the producers of Battlefield Earth because they have single-handedly eclipsed the memories of Waterworld and The Postman for post-apocalyptic bombast." -Fox News

  • be105.htm Battlefield Earth Review #105
  • be106.htm Battlefield Earth Review #106
  • be107.htm Battlefield Earth Review #107
  • be108.htm Battlefield Earth Review #108

    "At about the one hour mark, a portion of the audience split the scene and I don't blame them. They were fed-up with being taken for complete and utter morons." -Jam! Showbiz

  • be109.htm Battlefield Earth Review #109
  • be110.htm Battlefield Earth Review #110
  • be111.htm Battlefield Earth Review #111
  • be112.htm Battlefield Earth Review #112

    I don't remember feeling physically ill after seeing a movie before.

  • be113.htm Battlefield Earth Review #113
  • be114.htm Battlefield Earth Review #114
  • be115.htm Battlefield Earth Review #115
  • be116.htm Battlefield Earth Review #116

    "Battlefield" Earth makes "Waterworld" look like a masterpiece." -- Los Angeles Times

  • be117.htm Battlefield Earth Review #117
  • be118.htm Battlefield Earth Review #118
  • be119.htm Battlefield Earth Review #119
  • be120.htm Battlefield Earth Review #120

    "The painting used to represent the ruined city is so obvious, I kept waiting for one of the ships to crash through the canvas."

  • be121.htm Battlefield Earth Review #121
  • be122.htm Battlefield Earth Review #122
  • be123.htm Battlefield Earth Review #123
  • be124.htm Battlefield Earth Review #124

    "Still, everyone on the screen was a pagan, thank God, with not a Scientologist in sight."

  • be125.htm Battlefield Earth Review #125
  • be126.htm Battlefield Earth Review #126
  • be127.htm Battlefield Earth Review #127
  • be128.htm Battlefield Earth Review #128

    "It’s a battle to not walk out"

  • be129.htm Battlefield Earth Review #129
  • be130.htm Battlefield Earth Review #130
  • be131.htm Battlefield Earth Review #131
  • be132.htm Battlefield Earth Review #132

    "... there is a God and His name is not L. Ron Hubbard."

  • be133.htm Battlefield Earth Review #133
  • be134.htm Battlefield Earth Review #134
  • be135.htm Battlefield Earth Review #135
  • be136.htm Battlefield Earth Review #136

    "I chose to take my wife to Battlefield Earth." -- Raptavio

    "So when's the divorce?" -- Roland

  • be137.htm Battlefield Earth Review #137
  • be138.htm Battlefield Earth Review #138
  • be139.htm Battlefield Earth Review #139
  • be140.htm Battlefield Earth Review #140

    "Battle for your refund!"

  • be141.htm Battlefield Earth Review #141
  • be142.htm Battlefield Earth Review #142
  • be143.htm Battlefield Earth Review #143
  • be144.htm Battlefield Earth Review #144

    "'Battlefield Earth' is synonomous with ugly. It's the 'Battlefield Earth' of web site designs. Ugly, stupid, unnecessary, and insulting to the viewer's intelligence." -- Ron Newman

  • be145.htm Battlefield Earth Review #145
  • be146.htm Battlefield Earth Review #146
  • be147.htm Battlefield Earth Review #147
  • be148.htm Battlefield Earth Review #148

    Q: What's the difference between Battlefield Earth and a turd?

    A: Turds don't cost 80 million dollars.

  • be149.htm Battlefield Earth Review #149
  • be150.htm Battlefield Earth Review #150
  • be151.htm Battlefield Earth Review #151
  • be152.htm Battlefield Earth Review #152

    Q: What's the difference between Battlefield Earth and a train wreck?

    A: People look at train wrecks.

  • be153.htm Battlefield Earth Review #153
  • be154.htm Battlefield Earth Review #154
  • be155.htm Battlefield Earth Review #155
  • be156.htm Battlefield Earth Review #156

    "OK. Now, what did Mr. Hubbard say about hate?" -- Mike O'Connor

    "A hell of a lot more than he said about love." -- Chris Leithiser

  • be157.htm Battlefield Earth Review #157
  • be158.htm Battlefield Earth Review #158
  • be159.htm Battlefield Earth Review #159
  • be160.htm Battlefield Earth Review #160
  • be161.htm Battlefield Earth Review #161
  • be162.htm Battlefield Earth Review #162
  • be163.htm Battlefield Earth Review #163
  • be164.htm Battlefield Earth Review #164
  • be165.htm Battlefield Earth Review #165
  • be166.htm Battlefield Earth Review #166
  • be167.htm Battlefield Earth Review #167
  • be168.htm Battlefield Earth Review #168
  • be169.htm Battlefield Earth Review #169
  • be170.htm Battlefield Earth Review #170
  • be171.htm Battlefield Earth Review #171
  • be172.htm Battlefield Earth Review #172
  • be173.htm Battlefield Earth Review #173
  • be174.htm Battlefield Earth Review #174
  • be175.htm Battlefield Earth Review #175
  • be176.htm Battlefield Earth Review #176
  • be177.htm Battlefield Earth Review #177
  • be178.htm Battlefield Earth Review #178
  • be179.htm Battlefield Earth Review #179
  • be180.htm Battlefield Earth Review #180
  • be181.htm Battlefield Earth Review #181
  • be182.htm Battlefield Earth Review #182
  • be183.htm Battlefield Earth Review #183
  • be184.htm Battlefield Earth Review #184
  • be185.htm Battlefield Earth Review #185
  • be186.htm Battlefield Earth Review #186
  • be187.htm Battlefield Earth Review #187
  • be188.htm Battlefield Earth Review #188
  • be189.htm Battlefield Earth Review #189
  • be190.htm Battlefield Earth Review #190
  • be191.htm Battlefield Earth Review #191
  • be192.htm Battlefield Earth Review #192
  • be193.htm Battlefield Earth Review #193
  • be194.htm Battlefield Earth Review #194
  • be195.htm Battlefield Earth Review #195
  • be196.htm Battlefield Earth Review #196
  • be197.htm Battlefield Earth Review #197
  • be198.htm Battlefield Earth Review #198
  • be199.htm Battlefield Earth Review #199
  • be200.htm Battlefield Earth Review #200
  • be201.htm Battlefield Earth Review #201
  • be202.htm Battlefield Earth Review #202
  • be203.htm Battlefield Earth Review #203
  • be204.htm Battlefield Earth Review #204
  • be205.htm Battlefield Earth Review #205
  • be206.htm Battlefield Earth Review #206
  • be207.htm Battlefield Earth Review #207
  • be208.htm Battlefield Earth Review #208
  • be209.htm Battlefield Earth Review #209
  • be210.htm Battlefield Earth Review #210
  • be211.htm Battlefield Earth Review #211
  • be212.htm Battlefield Earth Review #212
  • be213.htm Battlefield Earth Review #213
  • be214.htm Battlefield Earth Review #214
  • be215.htm Battlefield Earth Review #215
  • be216.htm Battlefield Earth Review #216
  • be217.htm Battlefield Earth Review #217
  • be218.htm Battlefield Earth Review #218
  • be219.htm Battlefield Earth Review #219
  • be220.htm Battlefield Earth Review #220
  • be221.htm Battlefield Earth Review #221
  • be222.htm Battlefield Earth Review #222
  • be223.htm Battlefield Earth Review #223
  • be224.htm Battlefield Earth Review #224
  • be225.htm Battlefield Earth Review #225
  • be226.htm Battlefield Earth Review #226
  • be227.htm Battlefield Earth Review #227
  • be228.htm Battlefield Earth Review #228
  • be229.htm Battlefield Earth Review #229
  • be230.htm Battlefield Earth Review #230
  • be231.htm Battlefield Earth Review #231
  • be232.htm Battlefield Earth Review #232
  • be233.htm Battlefield Earth Review #233
  • be234.htm Battlefield Earth Review #234
  • be235.htm Battlefield Earth Review #235
  • be236.htm Battlefield Earth Review #236
  • be237.htm Battlefield Earth Review #237
  • be238.htm Battlefield Earth Review #238
  • be239.htm Battlefield Earth Review #239
  • be240.htm Battlefield Earth Review #240
  • be241.htm Battlefield Earth Review #241
  • be242.htm Battlefield Earth Review #242
  • be243.htm Battlefield Earth Review #243
  • be244.htm Battlefield Earth Review #244
  • be245.htm Battlefield Earth Review #245
  • be246.htm Battlefield Earth Review #246
  • be247.htm Battlefield Earth Review #247
  • be248.htm Battlefield Earth Review #248
  • be249.htm Battlefield Earth Review #249
  • be250.htm Battlefield Earth Review #250
  • be251.htm Battlefield Earth Review #251
  • be252.htm Battlefield Earth Review #252
  • be253.htm Battlefield Earth Review #253
  • be254.htm Battlefield Earth Review #254
  • be255.htm Battlefield Earth Review #255
  • be256.htm Battlefield Earth Review #256
  • be257.htm Battlefield Earth Review #257
  • be258.htm Battlefield Earth Review #258
  • be259.htm Battlefield Earth Review #259
  • be260.htm Battlefield Earth Review #260
  • be261.htm Battlefield Earth Review #261
  • be262.htm Battlefield Earth Review #262
  • be263.htm Battlefield Earth Review #263
  • be264.htm Battlefield Earth Review #264
  • be265.htm Battlefield Earth Review #265
  • be266.htm Battlefield Earth Review #266