UFOs Are Demons, Not Flying Saucers From Outer Space!

UFO's are out to deceive us, and only the pure of heart; only the godly; only the Real True Believers(tm)(©) can warn us about them in time until the Jesus comes to destroy these demon UFO beings.

You see, UFOs are actually demons from Hell, trying hard to steal your soul from you by making you believe they are not incorporeal minions of Satan, but real, physical objects. The story goes as follows:

Demons exist and they move to and fro within the world. People who see them, and who believe in the existance of demons, will warn people about them and ward against them. Ah, but Satan is much too clever for that! He makes the demons look like flying saucers from outer space, i.e. look like machines of great technological abilities that fly through the air (why these so-called demons are not merely rendered invisible, the Real True Believer(tm)(©) never quite gets around to explain). This explains how aliens (i.e. demons) like the Greys can walk through walls, enter locked buildings, levitate their kidnapping victims, render their victims paralyzed, and do all the other neat and nifty things Space Brothers (er, I mean demons) can do.

Alas, there are evil, non-believing skeptics out there in the world, working hand-in-hand with these demons (unwillingly or willingly), trying to deceive people into believing that not only do demons not exist, but UFOs themselves not exist. These demon-spawned skeptics are making it damn hard for the Real True Believers(tm)(©) of God warn people of the danger.

Take for an instance Carl Sagan's article in 12-06-95's Parade. A few quotes might be of interest:

"Everything hinges on the matter of evidence. On so important a question of UFOs, the evidence must be airtight. The more we want it to be true, the more careful we have to be. No witness's say-so is good enough. People make mistakes. People play practical jokes. People stretch the truth for money, attention or fame. People occasionally misunderstand what they're seeing. People sometimes even see things that aren't there.

"Essentially all the UFO cases were anecdotes--- something asserted. Most people honestly reported what they saw, but what they saw were often natural--- if unfamiliar--- phenomena. Some UFO sightings turned out to be unconventional aircraft; conventional aircraft with unusual lighting patterns; high-altitude ballons; luminescent insects; planets seen under unusual atmospheric conditions; optical mirages and loomings; lenticular clouds; ball lightning; sun dogs; meteors, including green fireballs; and artificial satellites, nose cones and rocket boosters spectacularly reentering the atmosphere. (There are so many artificial satellites up there that they're always making garish displays somewhere in the world. Two or three decay every day in the Earth's atmosphere, the flaming debris often visible to the naked eye.)"

You see how demonic Carl Sagan is, deceiving people into believing UFOs don't even exist?!?!?!? HOW DARE HE!

Ah, but we have folks who Know The Truth(tm)(©) and they are very happy to share it with us. Below are links to just a few of the warnings we have received from Real True Believers(tm)(©).

"Okay look think about what I am saying. The Reason I like UFO'S is cause noone who dosn't belive in UFO'S would ever be allowed to see one for example did you see or hear about the UFO sighting in Kansas City Mo. Last night of course you didnt because seemingly you dont belive in UFO's. Well do you watch any of the Startrek shows ,I do and I belive that if people like didn't exist maybe aliens would make contact and allow us into thier universe.Ya' Know If I am right you have screwed us ALL so SHUT UP.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!" -- Curtis Schrum

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